82 replies to this topic

[Dave Burrell]

Honesty on this forum is usually on the level, but Chip brought up a good point a few weeks back about the anonymous ID's and how people are hiding behind them and creating a bad vibe sometimes. I was thinking about that the past few days and thought I'd throw out this food for thought...

How do you take someone who is not honest about themself seriously at all on here?

Its funny and annoying at the same time watching some folks stand up on their soap box, beating on their chest, spouting their beliefs and trying to get everyone else to agree with them - but how can that be done when that person is a complete unknown - and completely unwilling to be honest?

Many folks have been on here a long time and many of us have met numerous times, so for the most part, many of the regulars here are not only friends online, but also friends out and about, going to lunches, dinners, hanging out etc.

Maybe some of the newbies here think its all just a game and only about anonymous posting to be funny or create bs, but for the long time users here - its more then that... its about being a community of friends with a common bond (living in or having interest in Folsom)

There's a few folks here still doing serious hiding behind anonymous ID's - and even creating more to further hide - heck one anonymous person just announced a new annoymous ID the other day... what the heck is the point in doing that? are they that afraid of people here or are they just trying to create problems?

I think Chip was completely right about his thoughts on usage of anonymous ID's and how it dillutes things sometimes. I also understand how some folks who are shy feel more comfortable in their anonymity - but those folks also usually don't post much and I can respect their choice to be private. Its the anonymous people who post often (and speak the loudest) that I'm really referring to in this post.

When someone is incapable of responding to questions or even PM's and refusing to be honest about things, I feel that maybe this is all just a joke to them and they're only here to rile people up and create chaos. what is the point in doing that? I really dont' get it - maybe I'm just over thinking? (too much coffee this morning?)

Try and be honest about yourselves and you may just find yourself enjoying this place a lot more.


I've met almost all the regulars here, even EDF, and I'd buy that dude a beer anytime, he posts some pretty harsh stuff sometimes but I give him lots of credit because he's got the conjone's to be honest about himself and his beliefs.....we may not agree much online but he's alright in my book... I respect his opinions alot more because he is always honest and not trying to hide who he is or what he believes in and thats pretty cool and actually healthy for very good debates that we can always learn something from.

- there should never be a fear of one another here, because there is nothing to fear, we're all just regular people who have a common interest (Folsom).

ok I'm probably just rambling now but I thought I'd throw that out there to see if anyone else sees this or feels this way.

[twnkltoz]

I agree. On another forum I'm on, if you attack someone, you'd better have your name in your signature. If not, you're out of there. The admin got sick of people hiding behind screen names so they can be nasty.

[notsure]

This is a great post. I am not a regular contributor here, but have been reading the forum quite regularly. I kind of stopped posting after seeing all the comments and slashing that some have been doing. It has brought in a lot of negativity to the forum.

I am hoping yor post opens a few eyes and they stop it soon.

Thank you and Wish you a very Happy New Year!

[Zoey]

I think thats absolutley correct..

I would love to meet anyone of you guys out and about in Folsom..

I feel bad for the people that do try and hide in this forum.. Its a wonderful place to find out about Folsom and the area for people.. (like myself) that are new to Northern California Area.

Thank you guys for being so kind and real with me

[MSgt]

there should never be a fear of one another here, because there is nothing to fear, we're all just regular people who have a common interest (Folsom).

There is a little bit to fear here. We do have a couple people who will use posts to try to get someone in trouble at their work place. I am thinking of that police officer who was turned in by one of our members for posting to this forum while he was at work using a computer owned by the city. The member did that because he was upset at what the officer said.

There are people here who will save PM's and post them in the forum when they are mad and want to make a point. This all rarely happens but we do have a couple mean spirited vindictive members. All I am saying is to use common sense.

This being said, I don't like the idea of multiple ids.... but what can you do?

[brown]

There is a little bit to fear here. We do have a couple people who will use posts to try to get someone in trouble at their work place. I am thinking of that police officer who was turned in by one of our members for posting to this forum while he was at work using a computer owned by the city. The member did that because he was upset at what the officer said.

There are people here who will save PM's and post them in the forum when they are mad and want to make a point. This all rarely happens but we do have a couple mean spirited vindictive members. All I am saying is to use common sense.

This being said, I don't like the idea of multiple ids.... but what can you do?

If people are concerned about being busted at the workplace, they should not be posting from work in the first place if that's against their company policy.

Personally I don't really care if people are anonymous or not. I know several people from this forum, and there's also tons of folks who I have not met whose opinions I respect. I've gotten a lot of great advice and learned about local events that I would otherwise have no clue about.

My pet peeve with this forum is that people continually respond to the trolls who simply post nonsense to get a rise out of people. If you don't like a thread or subject, you can simply move on or not respond. Personally I only read about half of the posts because the other half are just silly.

[stacycam]

I totally agree, Dave. I belong to another forum where there is NONE of this. I don't konw what they do differently, but there is a lot of mutual respect, and I think it's because, for the most part, everyone is honest about who they are. While most people on myfolsom are honest and true, the bad apples can definitely spoil the bunch sometimes.

Is there a way to stop multiple id's? I know there is always a way around it, because I remember cloud9 bragging about all the trouble he causes, but it would be nice to make them work really hard.

The biggest bummer about the trolls on here is that there are a lot of lurkers who come on to learn about Folsom, and since they don't know the history of some of these freaks, the innocents actually believe what the trolls say.

In the end, I think it's the nature of the beast. Unfortunately, we just have some really strange people who get off on making trouble, and being dishonest. The Internet just makes it really easy for these people to hide.

[Deb aka Resume Lady]

There are two different issues here: 1) use of anonymous IDs and 2) the manner in which people post.

1) I've been a member of a few different communities that had rules about multiple IDs, routinely checked IP addresses, and banned members who used more than one. From what I understand there's a way to work around that (am I right?) but I think most people don't know how to do that so it does cut down on the multiples. I also recognize that that takes time, and you have to have board administration that cares about that issue and has the time to do something about it.

2) How people treat one another on the boards. It's my biggest beef here, and even members who have used the same ID for years get downright rude, attacking others instead of debating the merit of the issue or attacking others just for posting what they post. I don't know why this is allowed. Whether or not we allow multiple IDs, I'd like to see a bigger commitment to creating and maintaining a site in which members communicate in a civil manner. We don't have to agree, but the art of respectful debate is nonexistent for many and they create an ugly environment that causes many other members to not participate (either at all or in specific topics). Again, it takes time to monitor the boards and a commitment to maintaining a certain kind of atmosphere.

[supermom]

No offense, but this thread was brought up before (by me) and it was closed by John.

Plus I was criticized by a member as encouraging censorship on the web and being a control freak.

heh--to each his own. Whatever.

As far as hiding behind an anonymous ID. Yep, I do. Look how many people view this board. Some appear to be regular Joe's until you have a different idea about something than them. Then they want to offer to smack you around or go toe to toe. Stupid.

Plus, there's some things I say on this board that I wouldn't necesarrily say to people I'm close with. Not because I'd embarras myself or them but because in real life I don't like to rock the boat. But I still like to be able to voice my opinions. But for those who have gotten to know me on this forum--and I have met--I think they'll tell you that just because I have an anonymous ID doesn't make me out to be a bad person. On the contrary--I'm a pretty nice person.
So, deal with it. Tough tooty and all that. I like my privacy.

But I do think it's pretty funny how many people I have really felt are actually just 4 or 5 posters. With the same MO and writing style. Whatever. John has stated he can't do anything about it. So-let it go. Before this thread get's taken over by them and get's closed like mine did.

Oh, and Davburr--I'd meet you any day--and you could see for yourself I'm not such a bad person. But then--you've been posting for quite a while and that just goes to show that I think you are probably a nice guy.

[stacycam]

Deb, the problem with trying to do something about disrespectful posting is that "censorship" will be screamed from the top of the hill. John is put in a bad place with this issue. If he tries to control disrespectful behavior, he is criticized. It would just be nice if everyone could be adults.

Truthfully, there is really only a handful who are consistently disrespectful. I think for the most part, people just let their emotions get out of hand, and they just need to be reigned back in.

[Dave Burrell]

No offense, but this thread was brought up before (by me) and it was closed by John.

Plus I was criticized by a member as encouraging censorship on the web and being a control freak.

heh--to each his own. Whatever.

As far as hiding behind an anonymous ID. Yep, I do. Look how many people view this board. Some appear to be regular Joe's until you have a different idea about something than them. Then they want to offer to smack you around or go toe to toe. Stupid.

Plus, there's some things I say on this board that I wouldn't necesarrily say to people I'm close with. Not because I'd embarras myself or them but because in real life I don't like to rock the boat. But I still like to be able to voice my opinions. But for those who have gotten to know me on this forum--and I have met--I think they'll tell you that just because I have an anonymous ID doesn't make me out to be a bad person. On the contrary--I'm a pretty nice person.
So, deal with it. Tough tooty and all that. I like my privacy.

But I do think it's pretty funny how many people I have really felt are actually just 4 or 5 posters. With the same MO and writing style. Whatever. John has stated he can't do anything about it. So-let it go. Before this thread get's taken over by them and get's closed like mine did.

Oh, and Davburr--I'd meet you any day--and you could see for yourself I'm not such a bad person. But then--you've been posting for quite a while and that just goes to show that I think you are probably a nice guy.

I remember you bringing this up before and Chip too (I thought it was great that you did that)... just been thinking about it lately and thought I'd throw it out there again

I'm personally totally against censorship (as most of you already know) but this shouldn't be about the mods even having to bother censoring someone - people should take it upon themselves to do the right thing in the first place, then censorship is no longer necessary at all.

I really don't consider you to be anonymous supermom, because you wear your heart on your sleeve and I feel you've always been 100% honest - and I completely respect that you do that and I respect your opinions (you don't hide), now I wont' always agree with you, but I will always respect you for your honesty in your posts.

Plus I remember seeing you at the My Bro Vinny's get together way back, you're a real person and a darned good one too...as is most everyone here.

I too know how you feel when you say you can post more things on here then you'd say in person - for some reason i think when we can write something down - thinking about it while writting - it gives us time to think more about what we're going to say and so we tend to put more thought into what we're posting then perhaps we might be able to instantly reply when conversing in person

all these replies are great - you're all a good bunch of people and to Mike, you brought up a good point, its too bad that information was used against a person .... but then again, brown brought up a good point too about that situation.

all in all it goes back to honesty.... doing the right thing..

[Deb aka Resume Lady]

It amazes me that people don't know the difference between enforcing civil discussion and censorship. Differing opinions are welcome, it's the manner in which those opinions are expressed that determine whether that discussion is civil or not. Civility is enforced on many other forums; it can be done.

[Dave Burrell]

Deb, the problem with trying to do something about disrespectful posting is that "censorship" will be screamed from the top of the hill. John is put in a bad place with this issue. If he tries to control disrespectful behavior, he is criticized. It would just be nice if everyone could be adults.

Truthfully, there is really only a handful who are consistently disrespectful. I think for the most part, people just let their emotions get out of hand, and they just need to be reigned back in.

that right there (in bold/underline) is the ultimate solution. well said Stacy

[Dave Burrell]

It amazes me that people don't know the difference between enforcing civil discussion and censorship. Differing opinions are welcome, it's the manner in which those opinions are expressed that determine whether that discussion is civil or not. Civility is enforced on many other forums; it can be done.

hot dang that is so very true - and I truly believe that it is beneficial for us all to hear and learn about differing opinions - without that, the discussions would be boring if we always agreed all the time... I personally get a lot out of topics that get heated (but remain civil) I learn about perspectives I might not ever thought about before.

[Deb aka Resume Lady]

John has the right to set and enforce rules of civility. Why should we lower our standards of civility because some members don't want to or know how to behave? It's not censorship, even if some here never get that point.