Plaxico Burress On Gun Safety
New York Giant's Plaxico Burress warns about the dangers of wreckless gun use.
(some strong language)
Jokes for today
Started by
Dave Burrell
, Nov 15 2005 08:52 AM
367 replies to this topic
#196
Dave Burrell
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#197
Brightside
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Posted 09 December 2008 - 12:28 AM
It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."
Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon honey, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you so much," begged Pedro.
"But I wanna just hold you hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncita, just one tine, do Weeweechu wit me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "Ok, one tine, we do Weeweechu."
...
...
...
...
So Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang...
"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry
Christmas, and a HHHHHappy New Year!!!"
Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon honey, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you so much," begged Pedro.
"But I wanna just hold you hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncita, just one tine, do Weeweechu wit me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "Ok, one tine, we do Weeweechu."
...
...
...
...
So Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang...
"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry
Christmas, and a HHHHHappy New Year!!!"
#198
Dave Burrell
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#199
camay2327
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GO NAVY
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Posted 10 December 2008 - 12:10 PM
A VETERAN
Whether active duty, retired, national guard or reserve - is someone who, at one point in their life, wrote a blank check made payable to "The United States of America" for an amount "up to and including their life".
That is HONOR, and there are way too many people in this country who no longer understand it.
-Author unknown-
#200
Dave Burrell
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#201
Darth Lefty
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Posted 10 December 2008 - 08:04 PM
"I enjoy a bit of cooking, and this has always worried me. But it's OK. I only like it because it allows me to play with knives." - James May
Genesis 49:16-17
http://www.active2030folsom.org
Genesis 49:16-17
http://www.active2030folsom.org
#202
mylo
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 11:01 AM
and for all the WoW fans:
"Ah, yes, those Gucci extremists and their Prada jihad!" --ducky
#203
Dave Burrell
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 11:18 AM
hahah that guy actually had pretty good aim!
Travel, food and drink blog by Dave - http://davestravels.tv
#204
mylo
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 11:19 AM
QUOTE(davburr @ Dec 17 2008, 11:18 AM) 
hahah that guy actually had pretty good aim!
Bush did have Cheetah-like reflexes. Either that, or he's used to things being thrown at him.
"Ah, yes, those Gucci extremists and their Prada jihad!" --ducky
#205
Dave Burrell
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 11:20 AM
QUOTE(mylo @ Dec 17 2008, 11:19 AM)
Bush did have Cheetah-like reflexes. Either that, or he's used to things being thrown at him.
Hahaha I think he's used to it - bet he sees pies fly by a lot when he's out and about
Travel, food and drink blog by Dave - http://davestravels.tv
#206
legofamily
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 06:36 PM
Okay here is one of my favorite jokes.
There is a lady who decides she wants to name her mansion. She says "I will name my mansion after the first person I meet today" She takes a walk and passes a gentleman and asks him his name. He says, "My name is Harry Butt" The lady decides to name her mansion Harry Butt Mansion. A couple of days later the lady gets a dog and can't decide what to name him. She says, "I will name him the first thing I see today" She takes another walk and sees a crack on the sidewalk and says, "I will name my dog Crack" One day Crack runs away. She looks everywhere. She calls the police frantically and says, "Help I looked all over my Harry Butt and couldn't find my Crack.
I know not real great, but for some reason I like it. I am pretty sure I improvised a little as I don't remember exactly how this joke goes.
There is a lady who decides she wants to name her mansion. She says "I will name my mansion after the first person I meet today" She takes a walk and passes a gentleman and asks him his name. He says, "My name is Harry Butt" The lady decides to name her mansion Harry Butt Mansion. A couple of days later the lady gets a dog and can't decide what to name him. She says, "I will name him the first thing I see today" She takes another walk and sees a crack on the sidewalk and says, "I will name my dog Crack" One day Crack runs away. She looks everywhere. She calls the police frantically and says, "Help I looked all over my Harry Butt and couldn't find my Crack.
I know not real great, but for some reason I like it. I am pretty sure I improvised a little as I don't remember exactly how this joke goes.
#207
Bill Z
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Posted 17 December 2008 - 08:22 PM
There once was a fellow McSweeny
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be couth
He added vermouth
Then slipped his girlfriend a martini
Who spilled some gin on his weenie
Just to be couth
He added vermouth
Then slipped his girlfriend a martini
I would rather be Backpacking
#208
mylo
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Posted 18 December 2008 - 10:07 AM
"Ah, yes, those Gucci extremists and their Prada jihad!" --ducky
#209
Andrea V
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Posted 19 December 2008 - 08:19 AM
WHO IS YOUR ROLE MODEL?
Try it without looking at the answers.
1) Pick your favorite number between 1 and 9.
2) Multiply by 3.
3) Add 3.
4) Multiply by 3 again. I'll wait while you get the calculator. You will get a 2-digit number.
5) Add the digits together.
Now with that number see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:
(Scroll down)
Hee Hee
1. Albert Einstein
2. Abraham Lincoln
3. John McCain
4. Nelson Mandela
5. Adolph Hitler
6. Mahatma Gandhi
7. Brad Pitt
8. Bill Gates
9. Andrea V.
10. George Washington
I know… I just have that effect on people. One day you too may be like me. Believe it!
PS. Stop picking different numbers. I AM YOUR IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT!
Try it without looking at the answers.
1) Pick your favorite number between 1 and 9.
2) Multiply by 3.
3) Add 3.
4) Multiply by 3 again. I'll wait while you get the calculator. You will get a 2-digit number.
5) Add the digits together.
Now with that number see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:
(Scroll down)
Hee Hee
1. Albert Einstein
2. Abraham Lincoln
3. John McCain
4. Nelson Mandela
5. Adolph Hitler
6. Mahatma Gandhi
7. Brad Pitt
8. Bill Gates
9. Andrea V.
10. George Washington
I know… I just have that effect on people. One day you too may be like me. Believe it!
PS. Stop picking different numbers. I AM YOUR IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT!
<3
#210
Bill Z
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Posted 19 December 2008 - 09:58 AM
it seems someone didn't like my last limerick,
you can PM me if you want to know what it was.
So in the holiday spirit, I bring you this limerick
There was an old fellow named Claus
With a case of the mid-winter blahs.
Taught his reindeer to fly
So they took to the sky.
The taps on your roof may be paws.
you can PM me if you want to know what it was.
So in the holiday spirit, I bring you this limerick
There was an old fellow named Claus
With a case of the mid-winter blahs.
Taught his reindeer to fly
So they took to the sky.
The taps on your roof may be paws.
I would rather be Backpacking
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