82 replies to this topic

[Dave Burrell]

John has the right to set and enforce rules of civility. Why should we lower our standards of civility because some members don't want to or know how to behave? It's not censorship, even if some here never get that point.

it's unfortunate that John is forced to do that but I can see the need for it at times with some of the knuckleheads on here

[supermom]

I think everyone has a bad day-now and then. Rarely have I seen someone be offensive on more than one day or more than one topic.

Maybe I don't get offended as easily as other people--but I'll be honest here. I think that some people just whine.
A lot. I mean, A Lot. Ok--you don't like that someone complains about airplanes, so then don't read it. I think it was really hypocritical that some of the posters complaining on this forum about "meanies" are the same ones who jumped all over that person for starting a thread about airplane noise. Then they go on to say that new members might be driven away by "meanies". Hello---that's exactly what happened.

Ok---I just had to put that out there. I know it's been awhile since that happened but it surprised me how some posters behaved on that thread.

[Dave Burrell]

I think everyone has a bad day-now and then. Rarely have I seen someone be offensive on more than one day or more than one topic.

Maybe I don't get offended as easily as other people--but I'll be honest here. I think that some people just whine.
A lot. I mean, A Lot. Ok--you don't like that someone complains about airplanes, so then don't read it. I think it was really hypocritical that some of the posters complaining on this forum about "meanies" are the same ones who jumped all over that person for starting a thread about airplane noise. Then they go on to say that new members might be driven away by "meanies". Hello---that's exactly what happened.

Ok---I just had to put that out there. I know it's been awhile since that happened but it surprised me how some posters behaved on that thread.

you bring up a very good point there... sometimes I wonder if folks just use this place to anonymously vent their frustrations or just get off being mean to someone else.

I also agree that sometimes we have off days and may not come off too well

[Folsom Guy]

I remember you bringing this up before and Chip too (I thought it was great that you did that)... just been thinking about it lately and thought I'd throw it out there again

I'm personally totally against censorship (as most of you already know) but this shouldn't be about the mods even having to bother censoring someone - people should take it upon themselves to do the right thing in the first place, then censorship is no longer necessary at all.

I really don't consider you to be anonymous supermom, because you wear your heart on your sleeve and I feel you've always been 100% honest - and I completely respect that you do that and I respect your opinions (you don't hide), now I wont' always agree with you, but I will always respect you for your honesty in your posts.

Plus I remember seeing you at the My Bro Vinny's get together way back, you're a real person and a darned good one too...as is most everyone here.

I too know how you feel when you say you can post more things on here then you'd say in person - for some reason i think when we can write something down - thinking about it while writting - it gives us time to think more about what we're going to say and so we tend to put more thought into what we're posting then perhaps we might be able to instantly reply when conversing in person

all these replies are great - you're all a good bunch of people and to Mike, you brought up a good point, its too bad that information was used against a person .... but then again, brown brought up a good point too about that situation.

all in all it goes back to honesty.... doing the right thing..

Often times, great companies have suggestions/complaint boxes for it's employees to send in stuff annonymously. And it has led to great ideas or exposed serious breaches that helped big time. Many would not have spoken up if there was no such annonimity.

So, I personally don't see any dishonesty in someone wanting to be anon.. On the other hand, a forum can be created where everyone is reqd to have picture as well as ID. I am pretty sure the discourse on both would be different to some extent. But, there will always be people who tend to rub things a bit - in way not comfortable to some.

Barring a few annoyances, I haven't seen anything that's overboard in this forum....may be 'coz of good forum policing...

In short - if the forum is OK to allow then anon postings nothing wrong with the idea...can't call it dishonesty when someone chooses to be anon. By the same token, a person posting without being anon. may not necessarily be an honest person...

[Dave Burrell]

Often times, great companies have suggestions/complaint boxes for it's employees to send in stuff annonymously. And it has led to great ideas or exposed serious breaches that helped big time. Many would not have spoken up if there was no such annonimity.

So, I personally don't see any dishonesty in someone wanting to be anon.. On the other hand, a forum can be created where everyone is reqd to have picture as well as ID. I am pretty sure the discourse on both would be different to some extent. But, there will always be people who tend to rub things a bit - in way not comfortable to some.

Barring a few annoyances, I haven't seen anything that's overboard in this forum....may be 'coz of good forum policing...

In short - if the forum is OK to allow then anon postings nothing wrong with the idea...can't call it dishonesty when someone chooses to be anon. By the same token, a person posting without being anon. may not necessarily be an honest person...

you're right, there's nothing wrong with remaining anonymous - I hope thats not what you think i was trying to say... .I'm really referring to the folks who are espousing thier beliefs, reviews, etc as if they are an authority on the subject but yet they completely refuse to be honest otherwise, they just want to throw out their post and then they disappear back into anonymity - half the time those posts are to provoke people or put down people etc... thats the kinda thing I'm really referring to.. the bad stuff...

again, I absolutely agree that there is nothing wrong with being anonymous and I know that lots of folks find comfort in that - but I do think that if a person is going to spout off about something, they should be able to back up their statements with some kinda honesty.

I dunno if that makes sense or not.... dang it I'm on my 3rd cup of coffee now yikes...

[supermom]

Ps. Davburr--while we are on the topic of truthfullness and stuff--I just have to let you know that philosopically I disagree with your signature on right and wrong. 'cause I know for a fact that some times what's right can hurt and sometimes what's wrong has no consequences--otherwise folks wouldn't "risk" doing something right or wrong.

But I appreciate the sentiment. Your signature made me think today!!

[Dave Burrell]

Ps. Davburr--while we are on the topic of truthfullness and stuff--I just have to let you know that philosopically I disagree with your signature on right and wrong. 'cause I know for a fact that some times what's right can hurt and sometimes what's wrong has no consequences--otherwise folks wouldn't "risk" doing something right or wrong.

But I appreciate the sentiment. Your signature made me think today!!

hehehe mucho thanks for that feedback, its a line from a song by the band Lazy Boy - the song is called "This is the truth" - its a pretty good song with some interesting thought provoking lyrics in it... its one of those spoken word types of songs

take a listen to the song:

[twnkltoz]

It's not so much the anonymity that is an issue for me (I've met supermom, too!). It's when people hide behind that to make viscious attacks.

I've done some things on internet boards that I'm not proud of, getting caught in the heat of the moment. I find that when my name is in my signature, especially now that I have a book that I'll be promoting in the next few months, I am more likely to be thoughtful about what I post. I want to make sure that the image I put out there is one that I'm proud of and won't come back and bite me later. I'm not always successful in using that filter in time, unfortunately, but I think I'm getting better. I will often type out a whole post, think better of it, and just leave the thread.

[Dave Burrell]

It's not so much the anonymity that is an issue for me (I've met supermom, too!). It's when people hide behind that to make viscious attacks.

I've done some things on internet boards that I'm not proud of, getting caught in the heat of the moment. I find that when my name is in my signature, especially now that I have a book that I'll be promoting in the next few months, I am more likely to be thoughtful about what I post. I want to make sure that the image I put out there is one that I'm proud of and won't come back and bite me later. I'm not always successful in using that filter in time, unfortunately, but I think I'm getting better. I will often type out a whole post, think better of it, and just leave the thread.

thank you very much, that right there is exactly what I am talking about... well said!

and I couldn't agree with you more about what you wrote in bold

hey we gotta plan a sushi outting too this month (we'll discuss that more in the other thread later)

[ducky]

I understand the concern with the latest use of multiple IDs here. It has gotten really annoying and made me want to leave. I hope no one thinks I am one of those people that do that. I know that Spicy has regurgitated at least one of my phrases in s/her posts, but I will state for the record I only have one ID here and that's ducky. Besides, when have I ever posted a link to anything except those Rainbow bridge flood pictures when the earthen dam at Auburn broke? And I had to have help doing that.

As for honesty on the forum, this is the Internet, people. You really shouldn't believe everything you read on the Internet. I know I don't. Knowing what the person looks like or does for a living really isn't important to me.

I can totally understand the want to be anonymous. I don't know if some of the posts on here lately are just one person having a conversation with themselves, but the posting of personal information such as license plates and the conditions of the exterior of their home is a little disconcerting. And, in my opinion, the posting of PMs is just plain wrong.

Okay. I'm off my immature, annoying, hopefully-not-mean, single-ID soapbox.

[Bill Z]

I prefer to remain anonymous as I don't know who all of you are. I don't lie on here and I post things about myself that I don't share with my neighbors. So by "hiding" behind an anonymous ID, I feel more comfortable sharing my ideas and opinions on topics that I share with my close friends, but not with mere acquaintances. I share my opinions with you that some may find objectionable, like my views on politics, religeon, guns, abortion, suicide, etc. If I can't be anonymous, I would be as tight lipped about these topics as I am with my nosy neighbor. When one has views that go against the mainstream, one may not want to share those views with some wacko that may decide to retaliate against those with differing views.

[Dave Burrell]

I understand the concern with the latest use of multiple IDs here. It has gotten really annoying and made me want to leave. I hope no one thinks I am one of those people that do that. I know that Spicy has regurgitated at least one of my phrases in s/her posts, but I will state for the record I only have one ID here and that's ducky. Besides, when have I ever posted a link to anything except those Rainbow bridge flood pictures when the earthen dam at Auburn broke? And I had to have help doing that.

As for honesty on the forum, this is the Internet, people. You really shouldn't believe everything you read on the Internet. I know I don't. Knowing what the person looks like or does for a living really isn't important to me.

I can totally understand the want to be anonymous. I don't know if some of the posts on here lately are just one person having a conversation with themselves, but the posting of personal information such as license plates and the conditions of the exterior of their home is a little disconcerting. And, in my opinion, the posting of PMs is just plain wrong.

Okay. I'm off my immature, annoying, hopefully-not-mean, single-ID soapbox.

Spicy is the leading purveyor of this problem

you bring up very good points Ducky and you are definately not immature annoying etc, you're good people and always have been

[Dave Burrell]

I prefer to remain anonymous as I don't know who all of you are. I don't lie on here and I post things about myself that I don't share with my neighbors. So by "hiding" behind an anonymous ID, I feel more comfortable sharing my ideas and opinions on topics that I share with my close friends, but not with mere acquaintances. I share my opinions with you that some may find objectionable, like my views on politics, religeon, guns, abortion, suicide, etc. If I can't be anonymous, I would be as tight lipped about these topics as I am with my nosy neighbor. When one has views that go against the mainstream, one may not want to share those views with some wacko that may decide to retaliate against those with differing views.

what you're talking about is differnet - by being honest I don't mean you have to divulge personal info - just back up what you are saying... which you always have done. You're always honest about yourself and your beliefs, just as you now posted... and I think thats cool

[Robert Giacometti]

It amazes me that people don't know the difference between enforcing civil discussion and censorship. Differing opinions are welcome, it's the manner in which those opinions are expressed that determine whether that discussion is civil or not. Civility is enforced on many other forums; it can be done.

I agree with what you are saying, however who gets to decide what is civil? Those who post using what some might consider is "politically incorect " language, is that civil? When one posts "politically incorrect" language some accuse them of being hateful, because they aren't as openminded as they think they are.

One of the problems is that there are some on here, who when you question their LOGIC or THINKING, they feel its a personal attack against them. I enjoy having others challenge my thinking as it forces me to reevaluate my beliefs! Hopefully in the long run this makes me a better person.

I've been using my real name and posting far longer than most. I made a choice to use my real name, to force myself to be accurate, honest and respectful of others. I don't believe I've ever had a post that has been deleted for being offensive, name calling or being disrespectful. Yet, I suspect I've been called more names and accused of doing things for political reasons by others more than anyone else on here. When this happens, I take that as a compliment.

The only posts each one of can control are those of our own!

[Jolene]

Plus I was criticized by a member as encouraging censorship on the web and being a control freak.

Yes, I implied that you encouraged censorship with several of the changes/questions that you suggested and asked, respectively, but I never called you a control freak. I'm sorry if I offended you (which I assumed, long ago, I did, because you never responded to my post on this subject), but please refrain from putting words in my mouth. Thanks.

As to the subject, it keeps coming up over and over, and I didn't note who said it, but I feel that whomever it was who said that people responding to the trolls is one of the problems is spot-on. Especially since John has stated that he doesn't have the time nor the inclination to go IP hunting and ban multiple IDs. That's totally his choice and I can understand and respect it completely.

However, the alternative is then the example of someone like Darthvader. We see people getting on Darthvader for his negativity, if everyone stops replying to him, perhaps he'll just quietly go away?

You can't change or control anyone, if you're expecting everyone to act like adults. So, respond to those whom you know are real and honest (despite having met them or not) and ignore the rest.

The cream will rise.