34 replies to this topic

[OctoberLily]

The last time I checked, my teenage niece had about 5,000+/- people look at her myspace. I asked her if she felt wierd having strangers know everything about her and she just said, "I don't know." However, the last I checked, she had taken some personal info down. My younger niece had set hers to private. I see alot of kids doing this - mostly girls. I think this is a good thing.

I also have warned my kids of the dangers of posting too much info. My youngest son had someone create a myspace page in his name to try to discredit or ruin his reputation by claiming he was gay. Everyone that knew my son basically shut this kid down as a loser. So, I agree that you have to be extremely careful what you put online. There are too many kooks out there to display your whole life and activities in front of them and then expect to be safe. Protect yourself and keep your info private.

[tessieca]

I set up a profile to keep up with what my kids, nieces & nephews were up to. I let my minor children on it as long as they keep it private and accept only known "friends," and as long as they add me . My adult children and relatives have the option to add me or not, of course. My eldest thinks it's weird for me to read what her friends say to her. She also made me update my profile when it defaulted to "single."

There's definitely an easy line to cross as a parent, though. I see things such as divorcees trolling for men, who add their teen daughters to their sites and link to their profiles. There's kind of a reverse privacy issue there. That kind of thing shouldn't be shared/flaunted with your impressionable kids. It doesn't get the same attention as kids getting into trouble on the site, but it's Parents Behaving Badly.

[checkmate3001]

MYSPACE.COM

I have boys that have profiles on Myspace.com. After seeing a few articles about Myspace, I was curious and looked into it.

I found my sons' profiles quite easily. In fact, I found my nieces and nephews profiles as well. Not to forget to mention the profiles of some parents that I know.

I would like to have a general discussion on how you, as teenagers, feel about parents going into Myspace and checking your profiles out.

Surprisingly, my sons, nieces and nephews allowed me to become a "friend". I check and comment every now and then on their profiles. They don't seem to mind. They send me loving little notes back.

I make my kids aware that I will from time to time go on myspace and look at their profiles. At first, my youngest son had a problem with this but has accepted my argument that if MILLIONS of other people/strangers are allowed to view their profile, then surely, I can check them out. If they have nothing to hide, then all is fine.

What are your thoughts on this?

I think EVERY parent should check out their kids MySpace. I don't care about the Privacy thing - it's on the internet and IS NOT IN ANY WAY PRIVATE! If kids are dumb enough to put their deepest secrets on MySpace then they have no right to complain when you go and 'spy' on them.
Unfortunately people have gotten the idea that because it is called 'myspace' that their sites are 'Their' sites. They are not. They are easily accessable and any creep or psycho can find out tons of information about these kids just from their pages and those bulletins they post where they answer 10000 questions about themselves. They are just asking for trouble.
Parent's need to check up on their kids - some kids are just too dumb or trusting. I've seen news stories where kids have gotten in a whole mess of trouble because they posted pictures of them smoking weed and stuff. Personaly I don't care what they smoke as long as they don't do anything crazy, but come on. Don't be idiots!
Everyone should look at their myspace as if it were a bulletin board along the freeway. Cuz that's how many and what type of people are going to see it. You never know who is out there looking in.

[brandon983]

If my parents did that I would be soooo pissed!!!!!!!

[mylo]

Remeber, January 30th is International Delete Your MySpace Account Day

http://bloggasm.com/...ace-account-day

[TawnyK]

I've had my myspace profile for almost 5 years now. I've really watched it change. When I got my profile there were only 5 other profiles in my entire zip code, there are now 75 pages of profiles.

Here are my thoughts, both as a fan of myspace (keeps me connected to my out of state friends, my out of town sisters and up to date on the business of the bands I love) AND as a mother of a kid with a myspace profile.


First off.....myspace is a public place where adults do go to meet. Consider it like a bar for all ages....or a pub? Would you drop off your teenager at the pub and let them hang out there unsupervised? Hopefully not. Would you possibly go out to dinner there and bring your teenaged kid? Ofcourse (I've seen it at Streets). Myspace is kinda a similar situation only without any kind of bouncers or employees....It's ok with me that kids are on myspace. But I think kids should always be supervised.

Secondly. I think it's ok for a parent to create a profile, and use myspace for their personal use. Sometimes the best way for a parent to understand something their kid is into is to experience it first hand and then make a decision on if they as a parent are comfortable with their child being part of it.

Third, NEVER EVER EVER be a sneaky parent. I completely disagree with snooping sneaky parenting. Tell your kid upfront that you have a profile, friend them, make sure you have your child's password (this is important for MANY reasons not just checking up) and then just like at a job where your calls may or may not be monitored tell your child that you may randomly check their profile and not to change the password. Just set some rules and be fair and upfront about your reasons and expectations.

Here is the thing- if you are fair and clear your teen will less likely balk, and if a kid is trust worthy you probably won't need to check it much at all.

Myspace is a very popular form of communication. It's not the devil. And really, being a parent means parenting your kids, if you were at a pub and a stranger made a pass at your child, or if another teenager was there and hazing and harassing your child you would be there to protect your child and you would get involved. Same with myspace.

I know that's probably gonna irritate every teen ager on this site and I am sorry in advance, but it's your parents job to make sure you arrive safely at adulthood. Then you get to take it from there.

[TOOK-er]

MYSPACE.COM

I have boys that have profiles on Myspace.com. After seeing a few articles about Myspace, I was curious and looked into it.

I found my sons' profiles quite easily. In fact, I found my nieces and nephews profiles as well. Not to forget to mention the profiles of some parents that I know.

I would like to have a general discussion on how you, as teenagers, feel about parents going into Myspace and checking your profiles out.

Surprisingly, my sons, nieces and nephews allowed me to become a "friend". I check and comment every now and then on their profiles. They don't seem to mind. They send me loving little notes back.

I make my kids aware that I will from time to time go on myspace and look at their profiles. At first, my youngest son had a problem with this but has accepted my argument that if MILLIONS of other people/strangers are allowed to view their profile, then surely, I can check them out. If they have nothing to hide, then all is fine.

What are your thoughts on this?

hey as a teenager, i have no problem with my parents wanting to see myspace. just like the rest of teenagers who are smart, and honest i have nothing to hide. you keep doing what your doing.

[TOOK-er]

I've had my myspace profile for almost 5 years now. I've really watched it change. When I got my profile there were only 5 other profiles in my entire zip code, there are now 75 pages of profiles.

Here are my thoughts, both as a fan of myspace (keeps me connected to my out of state friends, my out of town sisters and up to date on the business of the bands I love) AND as a mother of a kid with a myspace profile.
First off.....myspace is a public place where adults do go to meet. Consider it like a bar for all ages....or a pub? Would you drop off your teenager at the pub and let them hang out there unsupervised? Hopefully not. Would you possibly go out to dinner there and bring your teenaged kid? Ofcourse (I've seen it at Streets). Myspace is kinda a similar situation only without any kind of bouncers or employees....It's ok with me that kids are on myspace. But I think kids should always be supervised.

Secondly. I think it's ok for a parent to create a profile, and use myspace for their personal use. Sometimes the best way for a parent to understand something their kid is into is to experience it first hand and then make a decision on if they as a parent are comfortable with their child being part of it.

Third, NEVER EVER EVER be a sneaky parent. I completely disagree with snooping sneaky parenting. Tell your kid upfront that you have a profile, friend them, make sure you have your child's password (this is important for MANY reasons not just checking up) and then just like at a job where your calls may or may not be monitored tell your child that you may randomly check their profile and not to change the password. Just set some rules and be fair and upfront about your reasons and expectations.

Here is the thing- if you are fair and clear your teen will less likely balk, and if a kid is trust worthy you probably won't need to check it much at all.

Myspace is a very popular form of communication. It's not the devil. And really, being a parent means parenting your kids, if you were at a pub and a stranger made a pass at your child, or if another teenager was there and hazing and harassing your child you would be there to protect your child and you would get involved. Same with myspace.

I know that's probably gonna irritate every teen ager on this site and I am sorry in advance, but it's your parents job to make sure you arrive safely at adulthood. Then you get to take it from there.

i see where you are going, but we, as teenagers, know right and wrong. well, most of us do, it really depends on the parents. if someone makes a pass or tries hazing, we have two options... make our profiles private, and block the offenders, or we can tell our parents. me personally i would do both, but i don't need to because my profile is already on private. not disagreeing with you, but we don't need to be hovered over. it is as much a candy store, as it is a pub.

[TOOK-er]

I think EVERY parent should check out their kids MySpace. I don't care about the Privacy thing - it's on the internet and IS NOT IN ANY WAY PRIVATE! If kids are dumb enough to put their deepest secrets on MySpace then they have no right to complain when you go and 'spy' on them.
Unfortunately people have gotten the idea that because it is called 'myspace' that their sites are 'Their' sites. They are not. They are easily accessable and any creep or psycho can find out tons of information about these kids just from their pages and those bulletins they post where they answer 10000 questions about themselves. They are just asking for trouble.
Parent's need to check up on their kids - some kids are just too dumb or trusting. I've seen news stories where kids have gotten in a whole mess of trouble because they posted pictures of them smoking weed and stuff. Personaly I don't care what they smoke as long as they don't do anything crazy, but come on. Don't be idiots!
Everyone should look at their myspace as if it were a bulletin board along the freeway. Cuz that's how many and what type of people are going to see it. You never know who is out there looking in.

ok, you find my myspace (it is on private) and i will take your argument as solid. not just anybody can see your myspace unless you let them. not to be rude, but think about it we do what we think we should do. the socially acceptable people only do what is right, we have a sense of right and wrong, but some ruin it for the whole. a lot of my most trustworthy friends don't have a myspace, because their parents think it will cause them to smoke pot or something, but that isn't right. we, the socially acceptable people, know the difference between right and wrong.

[TOOK-er]

Remeber, January 30th is International Delete Your MySpace Account Day

http://bloggasm.com/...ace-account-day

Why do that? lol i like my myspace

[mylo]

More kids not thinking and using MySpace:

http://www.kcra.com/...h...ac&psp=news

[supermom]

I respectfully disagree about the do not be sneaky parents idea.

Being sneaky is a great way to guage how well the kids handle the bit of leash you give 'em, and if they are are ready for more.

Ex: My kid wants to be allowed to stay at home after school without an adult going over to check on her. She says shes too old for that. I say I'll think about.

The next afternoon, I go home super early, and stealthily stand outside the house and listen to whats going on--inside.

I leave for a little bit and come back.

And find her best friend talking to her through a closed window.
Talking about me sneaking up on the house!!

Ha, ha ha ha ha.

I've made it clear, in the past that her friends are not welcome to come onto our porch and visit w/ my kids when I'm not home.

So, I stealthily exit my area and then call that girls mother and let her know that that girl is outside playing!! Ha ha.

I walk back over, looked surprised to see the little girl on my porch and kindly tell her to go home, as I have kids homework to check. As the girl is leaving, her cell phone rings; and I hear her say, " But mahhhhhm". Way too funny.

So then I go inside the house and have a discussion w/ my kid, which starts with "you remember when you said ou are ready to be home alone and not need supervision?"

My kid immediately looks sheepish and says, " yeah, I know, I didn't handle that well"

Score a point for both of us.

I see myspace accounts as a house. Are kids really ready for the unstructured rules of it? The only way you'll know, is if you pop in uninvited and check things out.

[TOOK-er]

If my parents did that I would be soooo pissed!!!!!!!

i would be pissed if they didn't check my myspace... i work very hard on it, and i think they like it . also, the only reason you wouldn't like it is if you have incriminating stuff on your myspace...

[TOOK-er]

I respectfully disagree about the do not be sneaky parents idea.

Being sneaky is a great way to guage how well the kids handle the bit of leash you give 'em, and if they are are ready for more.

Ex: My kid wants to be allowed to stay at home after school without an adult going over to check on her. She says shes too old for that. I say I'll think about.

The next afternoon, I go home super early, and stealthily stand outside the house and listen to whats going on--inside.

I leave for a little bit and come back.

And find her best friend talking to her through a closed window.
Talking about me sneaking up on the house!!

Ha, ha ha ha ha.

I've made it clear, in the past that her friends are not welcome to come onto our porch and visit w/ my kids when I'm not home.

So, I stealthily exit my area and then call that girls mother and let her know that that girl is outside playing!! Ha ha.

I walk back over, looked surprised to see the little girl on my porch and kindly tell her to go home, as I have kids homework to check. As the girl is leaving, her cell phone rings; and I hear her say, " But mahhhhhm". Way too funny.

So then I go inside the house and have a discussion w/ my kid, which starts with "you remember when you said ou are ready to be home alone and not need supervision?"

My kid immediately looks sheepish and says, " yeah, I know, I didn't handle that well"

Score a point for both of us.

I see myspace accounts as a house. Are kids really ready for the unstructured rules of it? The only way you'll know, is if you pop in uninvited and check things out.

ok that just upsets me a little... you don't just go into your house to find your kid doing it, instead you slunk around your own house to get her caught... all you are doing is teaching her to be sneaky. and for that you think you have out smarted us... that infuriates me.
point number two. you have to act surprised that this is happening. what are you a teenager? i hope im not being too rash, but come on... i'm 17 and i don't even do that. i hold my tongue well enough, but when you think it is funny to get someone in troble for something as trivial as that... i can't help but point it out. i am probably being too brash, but it is what is on my mind.

[Summer22]

Sorry, its just a little wierd is all. I know it started out for muscians, but it has evolved into a teen thing. But hey, as long as you are not doing like other parents do, and create a full on profile with descriptions of yourself, pictures, and cool backgrounds, i guess its ok.

I agree. As long as your not snooping on your kids myspace its ok, but if you were and pretending to be them and talking to their friends that is not alright.