I also have no problem ordering off menu and agree that if Inwit is really so stressed out by this, he/she would do better to prepare all their food at home. Having worked in several restaurants I can tell you many kitchens open up to the dining room or at least the galley which is in full view of the waitstaff and bussers at all times, not to mention there are generally several chefs ( line cooks, sous, garde manger ,et all) also in the kitchen who would be witnessing this.
Just curious Inwit.... do you ever eat fast food?
My decision not to order "off menu" doesn't stress me out at all. I only have gotten worked up over the apparent lack of peoples ability to accept my decision as my choice and keep on recommending I do the opposite. I have no intention of changing my ways on this matter.
And while I always feel enticed by Crab Feeds, my preference in avoiding large crowds keeps me at bay.
and FWIW, the King crab at Blu Seafood has satiated my craving for some good crab. My thanks once again to Kathy for her suggestion. Muy Bueno!