83 replies to this topic

[Dave Burrell]

breast feeding is life in action, infants need to feed. Its not always convinient for a mom to drive home to breast feed.

this is normal folks - no need to be offended by a mother feeding her child

and its a lot less shocking then seeing two guys or even a hetero couple making out at the table next to you

[cw68]

I'm a breastfeeding mom of a 5 1/2 month old. I wish our society would be more open about breastfeeding in public! I think if you're being discreet by covering up then it shouldn't be a problem. Unfortunately, a lot of people don't agree with that. Parent's make a lot of sacrifices but you shouldn't have to remove yourself from events/dinners/parties/shopping/etc for 20+ minutes just because you need to feed your child. All of those I have had to do because I know how uncomfortable people are even if you're covered up. Perhaps, if our society lightened up about this, more people would choose to breastfeed.

Yes, you can feed your baby in the bathroom. I've had to do this numerous times. What happens when the person in the next stall flushes and it interrupts the babies feedings??? You're stuck again with an unhappy baby. Not the best solution. A car is good but not always convenient. The Roseville Galleria has a nursing room in the family restroom but because toddlers are noisy it doesn't work either. I found dressing rooms to be an easier place to nurse in. I had to use a back room when I was at a christening for my niece. I was ready to nurse on the bench but got the impression the back room was preferred. Those are just a few examples of how inconvenient it can be because other people aren't comfortable with a completely natural act.

It's more work than it's worth to take a baby to a restaurant. I've only taken my daughter to 1 restaurant that was a sit down place. I was with a friend and I had to get up once to try to feed her in the bathroom and then someone flushed the toilet in the next stall...didn't work. I got up a couple more times and then she was great the rest of the time. It was too much work and I'd rather see a breastfeeding mom who was being discreet than to have a crying baby. I do believe parent's should respect others and remove their crying babies to calm them down.

Babies nurse for both nutrition and comfort. If a baby is well fed before going out they could still want to nurse for comfort. So you can't "prepare" your baby to not want to nurse before you go out. I've tried that and it always seems like they still want to nurse while they're out.

The only fair comparison of an exposed breast is a man's exposed chest. A penis exposed in public and a breast to feed a child aren't even close. I can't even believe that swmr made a comparison like that.

I do appreciate that Babies R Us has a nice mother's room that is quiet to feed your baby. It really helps when you're out to use it and not to have to go home or to the car. Thanks! I wish more places would have rooms like this.

There is so much more to talk about and I'm glad it's being discussed.

Keep the chin up, Erika. It does get easier, trust me. I nursed both of my kids for about a year each. btw, Nordstrom has great areas to nurse and/or change your baby. It's a calm, clean and nice area. When you're out at restaurants, booths work better than chairs for nursing. It's more comfortable for both you and baby, and it seems to be more private so you don't have to put up with the nasty looks. I also found that draping myself seemed to draw attention to the nursing. It's easier, and less gets exposed, to pull your top up to nurse than it is to unbutton and pull your shirt to the side. Regarding the nasty looks, as long as you know you're doing your part to be discreet, carry on!

[Cinnadog]

I agree with you Erika. It is not fair -- and not right-- that moms should be forced to miss meals, church services, family events, shopping trips, etc. because they are nursing.

For those who have never breastfed, this isn't a 5 minute proposition. It's not like a quick trip to the restroom and then you're back. For many babies, especially newborns, nursing can be anywhere from 20-45 minutes, up to ten times a day (and night). If we expect women to be sequestered in their home or in a bathroom all this time, they're going to miss an awful lot of life. --Swmr, would you be willing to sit in a Chili's bathroom or a church bathroom for 45 minutes?

Also, please recognize that nursing a baby is not some quirky, New Age "choice" that some mothers make. Scientific evidence shows that nursing is FAR superior to any formula in terms of nutrition, illness-prevention, and brain development.

For the good of children, it is incumbent on all of us to encourage mothers to nurse their babies. One way to do this is to not make moms feel like pariahs when they nurse.

Erika, I hope you will begin to feel more comfortable nursing in public. For every dirty look you may get (probably mostly from "old school" types who don't understand the benefits of nursing), rest assured that many more modern, knowledgeable moms and dads are thinking, "Wow, there's a mom who is doing the right thing for her baby!"

[Orangetj]

I have found that many people from my parent's generation were told by their doctors that formula was better for us than breastfeeding! Crazy, eh?! I guess we humans often think we know better than nature, though. Perhaps this explains the reaction of some of the "old school" types.

I have to echo the statement above about breast feeding being a major time committment - 30+ minutes at a time and often with no more than an hour in between feedings. I know that it has oftened seemed like my wife spends half of her time feeding!

[Cinnadog]

I have a lot of friends who are around baby-having age. I am frequently at social events with these women (and their babies)-- lunch at restaurants, tea and a chat at my house, baby showers, dinner parties, whatever.

I would much rather continue to converse with my friend and enjoy her company than be left twiddling my thumbs at a restaurant table for 40 minutes while she disappears to nurse her baby.

The first time you see a woman nurse, it may be a bit of a curiosity. Once you get used to it, you realize that they are still a person, they can still carry on a conversation and eat a meal even while the baby nurses.

Haven't most guys had a lot of practice maintaining eye contact even when talking to a very well-endowed woman??! --Socializing with a breastfeeding mom calls on the same skill!

[Erika]

Cinnadog, I do need to become more comfortable nursing in public and perhaps I should try it out more often. I was out with a friend at Borders in Roseville and was trying to find a place to nurse. We chose the History section because it was the least busy. I had to laugh to myself because I realized that older men shop in that section and quickly would turn away when they saw me. Hey, I got some privacy!

I also would rather have a nursing mom with me then to have to be alone while she goes off to nurse. It takes a huge amount of time. Also, going out to dinner with a nursing mom can be a lonely experience for the other person if the mom is in the bathroom. I should just start nursing anytime and anywhere. Those who haven't breastfed or don't have friends or family who have have no clue on how much of a commitment it is and how much time it takes. It's especially time consuming at the beginning.

There are so many benefits to nursing and they actually did a study to prove that breast milk was superior to formula. I know formula feeding use to be all the rage but now breastfeeding is the preferred choice.

[sat]

I think this topic is something that people will never agree. Myself, personally, could never breastfeed my three children in the public, even in bathrooms. Sorry, just the way I am. I only breastfed my children for three months, a lot shorter than the recommended time. My two sisters breastfed their babies for at least six months, if not a year. They had no worries if they were in a restaurant, and had to breastfeed, but they were discreet. I just could not do this, but do not think woman should be banned from breastfeeding in public as long as they are covered up. About a year ago, my family went to a street fair in Jackson, and my 4-year-old son witnessed a mother feeding her child. She was sitting on the curb, and she absolutely was not covered up. It was all out there to be seen by everyone. I had a lot of questions to answer from my 4-year-old on the way home.

[Cinnadog]

I had a lot of questions to answer from my 4-year-old on the way home.

What more is there to say than, "God made breasts so that women could feed their babies"?

Since most children learn at an early age that mammals nurse their babies (think cows and calves), I found that kids take this information in stride.

[Cinnadog]

I don't have the problem with the breastfeeding questions it was how does the baby come out of your belly questions that got me!

I am more worried about the "How does the baby get into your belly?" questions!

[tallady]

I would hate to have a woman go into a bathroom to breastfeed her baby - ugh Have you seen some of the women's restrooms? There is no where to sit other then the toilet - nice, huh? Breastfeeding in public is perfectly acceptable. Heck, you see more exposed boobs in the general population then what most breastfeeding mothers expose

[rlsliger]

Haven't most guys had a lot of practice maintaining eye contact even when talking to a very well-endowed woman??! --Socializing with a breastfeeding mom calls on the same skill!

I was always told not to stare at the sun too. Sometimes you just can't help yourself!

[Orangetj]

Yeah, that's tough. In physics, we learn that the more mass an object has, the greater it's gravity. It turns out that eyeball orientation is affected by gravity as well, hence the difficulty we men have keeping our eyes off of large breasts.

One need only watch an episode of "Dog the Bounty Hunter" to see a perfect example of this. The gravitational force of that woman's boobs is so great that even the camera is affected and continuously drops in angle to point straight at her breasts!

I hope I haven't offended anybody!

Edited by Orangetj, 11 April 2006 - 03:02 PM.

[Steve Heard]

Haven't most guys had a lot of practice maintaining eye contact even when talking to a very well-endowed woman??!

That is very difficult to master. But, why try? Did you know that it's healthier to look? There's a study that proves it. Let's see if I can find it. Oh, yeah, here it is. I am told it's not a joke. It even starts out that way.

This is not a joke. It came from the New England Journal of Medicine.

Great news for girl watchers: Ogling over women's breasts is good for a man's health and can add years to his life, medical experts have discovered. According to the New England Journal of Medicine, "Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a well-endowed female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out" declared gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby.

Dr. Weatherby and fellow researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany, reached the startling conclusion after comparing the health of 200 male outpatients - half of whom were instructed to look at busty females daily, the other half told to refrain from doing so. The study revealed that after five years, the chest-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease.

"Sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation," explains Dr. Weatherby. "There's no question: Gazing at breasts makes men healthier." "Our study indicates that engaging in this activity a few minutes daily cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half. We believe that by doing so consistently, the average man can extend his life four to five years."

Now ladies, if you really care about your men, encourage them to stare at as many breasts as possible, unless you want them to suffer an untimely death!