147 replies to this topic

[BIG PAKO]

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

God.

Who?

God.

Who?

God.

Must be the wind.

[BIG PAKO]

Two cannibals are eating an atheist, and one says to the other, “Can you believe the way this guy tastes?”

[BIG PAKO]

Atheist: What’s this fly doing in my soup?
Waiter: Praying.
Atheist: Very funny. I can’t eat this. Take it back.
Waiter: You see? The fly’s prayers were answered.

[BIG PAKO]

How many atheists does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to actually change the bulb, and the other to videotape the job so fundamentalists won’t claim that god did it.

[BIG PAKO]

Why does an atheist wear red suspenders?
To keep his pants from being taken up to heaven during the rapture.

[supermom]

and to supermom - I thought Costco's questions were very good and thought provoking - why the slam?

Not a slam--merely an observation. That person is crying for attention.

Heres' a thought for those of you whom proclaim religion is false and science is tangible.

First, let's assume a scientist goes through the proper (as adopted) scientific study of a hypothesis.

This entails?

First a question.

Then one must devise a plan to test the hypothesis.

Then one performs the test.

Then one reports on their findings with numbers and statistical results.

Eventually many have tested the same results with little variance and thus the hypothesis is agreed to be "fact" or scientific evidence.

Now--let's look at that for a second. One, the hypothesis in question is based on what?

You can speak of empirical data and you can claim that you spent so much time, resources or energy garnering the results: but in truth, the general public (particularly those who are not scientifically driven) must have faith that your assertions are actually true. You actually went through the scientific process to find your results.

Does it mean you actually did? What if bobby joe did and you are taking credit? Afterall, you own the lab and he just works there. What if Bobby Joe is a starving student and just wants the results to come in his favor ( a positive result means he gets paid)?

Kinda like the whole cloning thing with the scientist in Korea.

So, in truth, science is based on faith. Faith that the work is empirically true.
Funny because empirically sounds so scientific but is a man made name thus man made product--and not perfect.

The same with other aspects of science as well.

So, those who believe that science is better than god are really saying that the short sighted evolution of human understanding is better than God.

As for the rest---faith is something you either have or don't. Either you have a control issue which prohibits you from having faith ( which means you probably have issues at work in a co-working environment) or you are truly a paranoid person unable to accept that something bigger than yourself is fundamentally a part of your life.

Either way--it's a pretty self centered lifestyle.

[chris v]

Not a slam--merely an observation. That person is crying for attention.

Heres' a thought for those of you whom proclaim religion is false and science is tangible.

First, let's assume a scientist goes through the proper (as adopted) scientific study of a hypothesis.

This entails?

First a question.

Then one must devise a plan to test the hypothesis.

Then one performs the test.

Then one reports on their findings with numbers and statistical results.

Eventually many have tested the same results with little variance and thus the hypothesis is agreed to be "fact" or scientific evidence.

Now--let's look at that for a second. One, the hypothesis in question is based on what?

You can speak of empirical data and you can claim that you spent so much time, resources or energy garnering the results: but in truth, the general public (particularly those who are not scientifically driven) must have faith that your assertions are actually true. You actually went through the scientific process to find your results.

Does it mean you actually did? What if bobby joe did and you are taking credit? Afterall, you own the lab and he just works there. What if Bobby Joe is a starving student and just wants the results to come in his favor ( a positive result means he gets paid)?

Kinda like the whole cloning thing with the scientist in Korea.

So, in truth, science is based on faith. Faith that the work is empirically true.
Funny because empirically sounds so scientific but is a man made name thus man made product--and not perfect.

The same with other aspects of science as well.

So, those who believe that science is better than god are really saying that the short sighted evolution of human understanding is better than God.

As for the rest---faith is something you either have or don't. Either you have a control issue which prohibits you from having faith ( which means you probably have issues at work in a co-working environment) or you are truly a paranoid person unable to accept that something bigger than yourself is fundamentally a part of your life.

Either way--it's a pretty self centered lifestyle.

By your definition then everyone has or uses faith at some point. It's called logical faith. Religous faith is what is being questioned here, and the difference is there is no scientific proof.

[CostcoLover]

First, let's assume a scientist goes through the proper (as adopted) scientific study of a hypothesis.

This entails?

First a question.

And therein is the difference between science and religion. With religion you don't ask questions and if you do, the answer is always the same, "God".

Here, since you brought it up, lets compare the two (it's actually a silly argument as each addresses a different domain).

But before I go on, I'd like to point out that no atheist or agnostics are knocking on my door on a Saturday morning trying to convert me (how disrespectful). The only people I ever see crying out for attention are religious people. And it can't even be said of religious people equally as I've lived in Jewish neighborhoods, Buddhist neighborhoods, etc. and even in those neighborhoods it was always Christians (pick your flavor here) knocking on the door. No other religions seem to feel as insecure about their own faith. Now on to more fun.



vs.



Good thing the quiz is an open book test and still not one attempt to answer even one question.
Well then, it perfectly correlates with the footnote/postscript.

Oh what the heck, for the people that enjoyed the first 11 questions, here's the rest.

12. Which of the following is most likely to be true, and why?

1. Romulus was the son of God, born to a mortal human virgin
2. Dionysus turned water into wine
3. Apollonius of Tyana raised a girl from the dead
4. Jesus Christ was the son of God, born to a mortal virgin, turned water into wine, and raised a man from the dead


13. Conceding that torture is permissible under certain conditions, which of the following would be the best justification?

1. Your prisoner is the only one who knows the date and time of an assassination attempt on the Pope
2. Your prisoner is the only one who knows where a nuclear device has been planted in Washington, D.C.
3. Your prisoner is the only one who knows where a vial of nerve gas has been placed in the London water supply system
4. Your prisoner has announced that the earth revolves around the sun


14. We know that Christianity is true because the Gospel writers, inspired by God who can make no error, recorded the founding events. For example, on the first Easter morning, the visitors to the tomb were greeted by which of the following:

1. A young man (Mark 16:5)
2. No, no, it was no man, it was an angel (Matthew 28:2-5)
3. You're both wrong, it was two men (Luke 24:4)
4. Damn it, there was nobody there (John 20:1-2)


15. According to inerrant Scripture, the Savior prayed alone in the garden while the three disciples who accompanied him had fallen asleep. How did the gospel writer know the words of that prayer?

1. Jesus left them written down under a rock
2. They were recorded on a primitive taping device
3. The gospel writer was psychic
4. The three disciples were later hypnotized and asked to recall the prayer


16. According to at least one sainted church father, one of the pleasures of the saved will be to behold the agony of the damned. What would be the best time of day in heaven for a mother to behold the agony of her only son?

1. Early in the morning before it gets too crowded
2. Mid-day when she can compare notes and share the celebration with other mothers
3. Late at night when she can enjoy the flames in starker contrast


17. In the Judeo-Christian tradition, we always look to the Bible as a guide. In this example, your teenage son has returned home from the prom intoxicated. The Bible's instruction is:

1. Sit him down for a heart to heart talk
2. Enroll him in AA
3. Take away his driving privilege for one month
4. Smash his head in with rocks


18. In this example, your son-in-law, returned from his honeymoon, has just told you he suspects your daughter was not a virgin on their wedding night. Wishing to abide by God's holy rules as laid out in the Bible, you should:

1. Ask him if he was a virgin before you do anything
2. Advise him to forgive her
3. Talk to your daughter
4. Go find those rocks


19. You are eating lunch at a crowded fast food restaurant, occupied mostly by children, when suddenly a gunman bursts in, screams "Do not question or test me," and sprays the room with bullets. Ten people are killed instantly, many more grievously wounded, but somehow you escape unharmed. His ammunition expended, the gunman collapses to the floor. What should you do?

1. Call the police and wait for them to arrive
2. Call the police and leave
3. Risk death by asking the gunman why he did it, even though he told you not to
4. Fall on your knees and give thanks and praise to the gunman for sparing your life


20. Why did God show his backside to Moses, as described in Holy Scripture, Ex.33:23?

1. He invented everything, and this was simply the first mooning
2. He was really ticked off when Moses dropped the tablets
3. He was piqued, having just discovered His almighty powers were useless against chariots of iron (Judges I:19)
4. Moses was too serious and needed to lighten up a little


21. Jesus was God, and God knows all things, including all the medical knowledge that will ever be known. Why did Jesus blame demons for the case of epilepsy he cured?

1. He was suffering from a temporary case of "brain freeze"
2. The Aramaic word for "demon" is the same as the word for "cranial malfunction"
3. Neurology was not his specialty
4. In first-century Palestine, demons really did cause epilepsy. This affliction only began to be caused by electrochemical brain activity after about 1850 A.D.


22. This morning's paper carries a story about a suburban father who became so enraged with his disobedient children that he carried them both to the backyard pool where he drowned them, along with their puppy, their kitten, and their hamster. How should this father be treated?

1. He should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law
2. He should be banished from the town
3. He should be lynched to save the taxpayers' money
4. The townspeople should gather together to sing hymns of praise to him


23. This morning I started my day by insulting my mother in public, then punched out my father, my brother, and my sister. Then I gathered up all my clothes, sold them to a second-hand store, and with the proceeds bought a used Uzi and 50 rounds of ammunition. Next, I went down to the animal shelter and injected all the dogs with a drug that caused them to go insane and dive into the nearby canal where they all drowned. By this time I was hungry, so I went over to my neighbor's apple orchard and burned it down, because I wanted an orange and there weren't any. On the way home, I stopped at the local steel mill to discuss my philosophy of life with some of the guys. They laughed at me and said to stow it, so I tossed them all into the blast furnace. That night I discovered my son looking at a copy of Playboy. Concerned for his future welfare, I cut off his right hand. What historical character did my activities today most resemble?

1. Genghis Khan
2. Charles Manson
3. Adolph Hitler
4. Jesus Christ


24. Down through the ages, who has been most responsible for the medical discoveries that have relieved untold amounts of suffering and pain, and extended the length of that most sacred of creations, human life?

1. Medical doctors
2. Research biologists
3. Chemists
4. The Catholic Church


25. A great sadness has come into your life which you feel you cannot bear. A friend informs you of a free counseling service which has never failed to aid and comfort many others. You call the counselor; the phone rings and rings with no answer; you finally hang up. What is the most likely explanation?

1. The counselor is sitting by the phone but not answering in order to test your faith in him
2. The counselor always stands ready to hear your pleas for help, but sometimes the answer is "no"
3. The counselor will not answer because he wants you to profit by the spiritual strength that only comes through suffering
4. The counselor is not home

[wrabbit]

CostcoLover.....

A+++ Excellent post!

A very BIG THANK YOU!!!!!!

[MSgt]

And therein is the difference between science and religion. With religion you don't ask questions and if you do, the answer is always the same, "God". ...

I ask questions all the time. I spend hours in studing the Bible and I find love, faith, hope, healing, and more answers than I could ever dream to ask.

[supermom]

By your definition then everyone has or uses faith at some point. It's called logical faith. Religous faith is what is being questioned here, and the difference is there is no scientific proof.

The difference is: there is no difference. Scientific faith is based on errors and perceptions of humans.
Each faith has a built in message.

One hopes that each individual just doesn't get caught up in other people's poorly construed observations : so that they remain true to their faith.

Those who knock on one man's faith; are definitely insecure in their own faith. So look within yourself. How strong is your faith?

Why must all questioning of your faith be blamed on God?

Your faith is like any other relationship you have. You must always work on nurturing it. You may make mistakes and therefore you may need to slow down and repair what has gone awry--but if you are committed in your faith in that relationship--you will blossom.

Seeing the negatives all the time is merely a message to yourself that you have not attained a peacefulness within yourself that comes with acceptance in your faith or that you have obstacles blocking your relationship.

When you spew rhetoric against ones faith what you are really saying is that you are not in a position to view another as you have your own immaturities to deal with.

That's not a bad thing--but you drag yourself down- and you may offend the one you are talking to.

By no means am I a perfect Christian--but I won't talk down to another one- about their faith or lack of it. Faith is a constantly evolving relationship in which you are individually channeling your own way through. No one can take you by the hand and carry you through to the finish line.

Funny that CostcoLover claims only Christians partake in door-to-door evangelism (I too don't like that) and that only Christians try to change others beliefs: But he sure is putting up a strong front of anti- Christianity right now.

And your wrong that only people with religious beliefs have started wars. Hitler insisted he was not religious (though many wanted to believe he was a christian in order to fint into their ideas of hateful organizations--and many times it has been pointed out that most of his family was Jewish). The only reason why Christians were spared is because he wanted the support of the masses and the masses were disaffected by the richer and smaller populace which happened to be Jew. further he went on to kill any who questioned his authority and well as any whom held any sway amonst the populace who might renounce Hitlers regime.

I may be wrong--since I really don't feel like researching it--but I think that Hitler's war killed more people than the crusades did. heh--that's saying a lot.

[bishmasterb]

I'll have to do a bit more research on that one. But let me say this. I believe you yourself said you do not understand the whole concept of the Trinity. Don't feel bad, no one does. The Trinity is one of the mysteries of the Christian faith. I'm quite comfortable to say we will not understand it until we get to heaven. Then all those things will be made clear.

Put on your skeptical hat for a moment. Consider:

1) The Trinity concept is at best incredibly shaky and ambiguous in the OT; at worst, it's non-existent.
2) Early common era Christians, in the wake of creating a new religion, had to develop a way to demonstrate Christ's divinity while still holding firm to the mono-theistic traditions of Judaism.

Their solution, quite simply, would have been to create a logical inconsistency: God is one person and God is three person.

[wrabbit]

SuperMom..."Your faith is like any other relationship you have. You must always work on nurturing it. You may make mistakes and therefore you may need to slow down and repair what has gone awry--but if you are committed in your faith in that relationship--you will blossom."


The really BIG difference is I KNOW my wife exist and I KNOW we have a relationship. I don't have just faith, I really know it!

I don't think I have a relationship to a Big White Rabbit, as Christians feel they have a relationship to what they think is God.

Again, if God really existed, why doesn't he make himself known and undeniable????

Just answer that question! Why doesn't he??????

[supermom]

Put on your skeptical hat for a moment. Consider:

1) The Trinity concept is at best incredibly shaky and ambiguous in the OT; at worst, it's non-existent.
2) Early common era Christians, in the wake of creating a new religion, had to develop a way to demonstrate Christ's divinity while still holding firm to the mono-theistic traditions of Judaism.

Their solution, quite simply, would have been to create a logical inconsistency: God is one person and God is three person.

eh?

God is represented by three ideas and those ideas delve into what you are as a person and how to achieve a way to live as a "son" of God.

God the son is dutiful to Faith and beliefs
God the Spirit breathes the life of the faithful in his pores as well as in hi thought and deeds.
God the father is a teacher of the faith to others.

And yes--I know that is a different version of the trinity than what many have learned--but there ya go--homeschooling in bible studies and that was the way I was taught.

PS. My parents had stated many times while I was growing up that the Catholic church stole or plundered the original books to the bible and changed them. They state that there is 4 chapters missing from the bible. That the Catholic church has never released. I wonder how true that is?

[bordercolliefan]

Supermom, you seem as though you're offended by people raising questions about the basis for religious faith -- as if such a discussion should be off-limits. I don't understand that at all. If I say "I like Hillary Clinton," others feel free to jump in and say why they disagree with her. Why should religion be any different? I've enjoyed hearing all the religious folks' views (though I find them unpersuasive), and I've enjoyed hearing from my fellow skeptics.

Often religious people will try to explain how they "know" God exists by pointing to a deep feeling within themselves. "I just know." "I've felt God's spirit within me."

I find this very bizarre. In what other circumstance do we look WITHIN OURSELVES to find out some truth about the universe? "I wanted to know what the moon is made of, so I looked deeply within myself and was overcome by the feeling that it is made of cheese." --I'm just saying, "inside ourselves" is a strange place to look if we want to know if something exists out in the universe.

So what if you feel some warm, slightly intoxicated or peaceful feeling when you "look within yourself"? What's that supposed to prove? Isn't it likely just the product of a brain state -- great relaxation or emotional awareness? Or, do we think that God has planted this feeling (we call "faith") within certain people, like a hidden seed or maybe homing device?

I don't mean to be disrespectful, but I am honestly trying to examine this "feeling" that people believe proves the existence of God to them.