This is such a tragic event and my heart goes out to the family and friends left behind. My suggestion would be that people wait and see what the police reports say. I think that will be the most reliable source instead of he said she said. I think that would also show respect for the family.
Folsom Teen Found Dead
Started by
nomoser
, Mar 13 2007 09:19 AM
374 replies to this topic
#76
teresak
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 09:02 PM
This is such a tragic event and my heart goes out to the family and friends left behind. My suggestion would be that people wait and see what the police reports say. I think that will be the most reliable source instead of he said she said. I think that would also show respect for the family.
#77
palango
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 09:21 PM
very sad, tragic, and devastating news . My deepest condolences for his family and friends. I know that many people have jumped to conclusions NOT even within 24 hours of this event. No matter what the cause, the loss is terrible and senseless.
#78
GrifnRob's mom
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 09:26 PM
At this point, this thread has been looked at by nearly 8,000 people, close to 100 have posted on the topic and the media is monitoring this site.
As the parent of a high schooler who knew the boy, but more importantly the mother of children, I suggest that we end all speculation on this forum.
Think for a moment the unthinkable: if this were your child, your family, your friends. The LAST thing you'd want is people not only jumping to conclusions, but also sharing their uninformed "truths" with others. It's a horrid example, in this instance, of the old fashioned game of telephone.
None of us knows what happened. To speculate or draw conclusions based on anything other than fact which will only be borne out in time, is not only disrespectful but dangerous. Let this forum be an example of people, many strangers to one another, banding together for a greater good in an extraordinary time of need.
As I've heard from several people, the rumor mill is in full tilt. Let's not add to it, but rather keep the family in our prayers.
Bless them all...
As the parent of a high schooler who knew the boy, but more importantly the mother of children, I suggest that we end all speculation on this forum.
Think for a moment the unthinkable: if this were your child, your family, your friends. The LAST thing you'd want is people not only jumping to conclusions, but also sharing their uninformed "truths" with others. It's a horrid example, in this instance, of the old fashioned game of telephone.
None of us knows what happened. To speculate or draw conclusions based on anything other than fact which will only be borne out in time, is not only disrespectful but dangerous. Let this forum be an example of people, many strangers to one another, banding together for a greater good in an extraordinary time of need.
As I've heard from several people, the rumor mill is in full tilt. Let's not add to it, but rather keep the family in our prayers.
Bless them all...
#79
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 10:02 PM
I will keep the family and friends in my thoughts and prayers. How horrible.
#80
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 10:36 PM
THERE'S A HOLE IN THIS WORLD TONIGHT
The one thing about Andre that was special to me was his smile. His smile could light up an entire room, and I never saw him without his smile.
And I had to go to the high school today and pick up my child who was. . . so shocked . . . that verbalizing anything was impossible. I was met by sobbing teenagers, boys I've known since they were little guys, clinging to each other. They just milled around and cried.
The ones who cared for Andre did not ask "how" he died. They just cared that he is now gone.
And their grief ripped my heart out of my chest because I could not console them.
As speculations escalate I want people to remember this:
His parents saw him alive for the last time - and didn't realize it was the LAST time.
They will never, ever, ever watch their baby sleep again . . . . EVER
When he is lowered into the ground, it is over . . . FOREVER
His trusty skateboard will never soar the 10-stair again . . . EVER
His drum set will never rattle the walls again . . . EVER
Their lives, and the lives of their daughter and sons, will never be whole again . . . EVER
BUT - His life mattered so much to a whole bunch of people, & we cannot forget him . . . EVER
Please, let the police do their job.
And let us, as friends, neighbors, fellow parents, band together and offer our prayers and support to this family.
The one thing about Andre that was special to me was his smile. His smile could light up an entire room, and I never saw him without his smile.
And I had to go to the high school today and pick up my child who was. . . so shocked . . . that verbalizing anything was impossible. I was met by sobbing teenagers, boys I've known since they were little guys, clinging to each other. They just milled around and cried.
The ones who cared for Andre did not ask "how" he died. They just cared that he is now gone.
And their grief ripped my heart out of my chest because I could not console them.
As speculations escalate I want people to remember this:
His parents saw him alive for the last time - and didn't realize it was the LAST time.
They will never, ever, ever watch their baby sleep again . . . . EVER
When he is lowered into the ground, it is over . . . FOREVER
His trusty skateboard will never soar the 10-stair again . . . EVER
His drum set will never rattle the walls again . . . EVER
Their lives, and the lives of their daughter and sons, will never be whole again . . . EVER
BUT - His life mattered so much to a whole bunch of people, & we cannot forget him . . . EVER
Please, let the police do their job.
And let us, as friends, neighbors, fellow parents, band together and offer our prayers and support to this family.
#81
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 10:41 PM
Well said, Maltygirl.
My heart and condolences go out to all of you.
My heart and condolences go out to all of you.
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"How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world." ~ Anne Frank
#82
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Posted 13 March 2007 - 10:46 PM
[This is long. And a bit personal. Sort of. Skip it if you're only searching for solid information... Sorry for taking up space. x_x]
After reading this forum, relating to "The Folsom Boy Found Dead Hanging in a Tree", I'm both mad, sad, and in shock; I use all the repeated words like "shocked", "devastated", "tragic" etc again... Because for whatever reason, whenever I try to search for a better adjective/word, my brain shuts down.
[It seems like you guys aren't using his name for some reason, but I'm not sure why... to stay safe I'll refer to him as "A"].
I've known him since elementary school. For a short time, I hung out with him and one of his best friends and searched for garter snakes in the bushes of [what used to be] Lake Ridge apartments. [Now Waterford condominiums.] I watched him skateboard and fool around with his friends when I visited my close friend, who was his neighbor. I watched him and some boys play with airsoft guns together at night in the street.
That's all. Really, I can't say much more; he's no more to me than a childhood friend, then acquaintance, etc. But I'm still left pretty d*** hollow, learning about his death, and how it happened. [Or supposedly happened, there's so many versions to the story.]
Teachers got emails today during class about the incident. [I'm a Junior at FHS, if that hasn't been guessed yet.] At first his name slipped passed my head when I found out about it during clothing design. But then I repeated it to myself mentally, and thought, "Oh my God. You have GOT to be joking." It'd've been nicer if it were just a sick joke.
I asked my friend about it during lunch; she's been close to him since grade school. Way more than me, and she's the neighbor I refered to earlier. She said, "Yeah, he ran away or is missing or something, right?"
"No", I said. "He was discovered hanging from the tree at a park, T'." I couldn't say "He's dead", I just felt like I'd be shooting her if I did. I insinuiated my meaning by looking her dead on. She took her phone to the bathroom and called some people. 15-20 minutes later she came crying, and I held her head and pet her gently, hiding her tear-swollen eyes from people she wanted to avoid. Let her hide from the situation for a moment and grieve without the consistent "Are you ok?!?!?!".
People kept mouthing the question, "What's wrong? Is she ok?" I finally whispered, "A close friend committed suicide". T' said "No, he wouldn't have. He was taking out the trash, still in his pj's at the time. We think someone did it to him." She was upset. I nodded, but I still don't know what to think.
And the truth is? I didn't really care -what- happened. Just that. Well, it happened. [Lynched? Homocide? Suicide? KKK? Someone at school said an overdose on drugs? Please. I know we all have our suspicions, but let's not sollidify them until we get facts. This comment isn't directed, however, towards anyone who's posted.]
As I was walking to work [Kirala sushi, from the Willowsprings apartments; down Iron Pt.], I heard sirens wailing behind me. A firetruck [I think it was that, why don't they make the firetrucks all red anymore?] whizzed by, and I saw some dude ignore the fact that he's supposed to pull over when a firetruck/ambulence/etc passes by. I felt myself get upset and sad all over again.
Anyways, I'm home from work now. And as I type this, I wonder, "Why add 'fuel to the fire'? Why share thoughts that might worry others, or annoy them, or anything else inconvenient?". I haven't thought of an answer other than, "It's my way of trying to respect A'".
He was a great guy. A sweet guy, with a great smile. Smoothest skin ever. And I can't stress his smile. It was full, bright, silly, vibrant, caring, and happy. I log onto myspace to see all the dedications, slideshows, etc for him. Everyone's myspace name has "RIP A'". I got 5 text messages that were chains of "Pass this on in honor of A's memory."
Some of those things were sweet, while some were unnecessary. Some things people posted made the situation sound trivial, and that bothered me.
The message I really want out there is that A' is really missed. To have affected a person as distant as myself. His death got to so many people in so many ways. It's hard to comprehend all the madness and chaos that usurps our concentration when we think about things like death; especially the death of someone we all knew one way or another, someone so close to home. That's what really gets most of us, I think.
It's a crazy thing.
Hopefully, A' will not only be remembered because he was the top story on local news, or the latest thread on a forum, etc. But because he's a good guy. A family member, a friend.
End of the memory. Or something.
[I hope I don't get any negative comments to this. >_>; I noticed some people can be pretty cynical or blunt in this forum sometimes.]
-Phyllis Cho.
After reading this forum, relating to "The Folsom Boy Found Dead Hanging in a Tree", I'm both mad, sad, and in shock; I use all the repeated words like "shocked", "devastated", "tragic" etc again... Because for whatever reason, whenever I try to search for a better adjective/word, my brain shuts down.
[It seems like you guys aren't using his name for some reason, but I'm not sure why... to stay safe I'll refer to him as "A"].
I've known him since elementary school. For a short time, I hung out with him and one of his best friends and searched for garter snakes in the bushes of [what used to be] Lake Ridge apartments. [Now Waterford condominiums.] I watched him skateboard and fool around with his friends when I visited my close friend, who was his neighbor. I watched him and some boys play with airsoft guns together at night in the street.
That's all. Really, I can't say much more; he's no more to me than a childhood friend, then acquaintance, etc. But I'm still left pretty d*** hollow, learning about his death, and how it happened. [Or supposedly happened, there's so many versions to the story.]
Teachers got emails today during class about the incident. [I'm a Junior at FHS, if that hasn't been guessed yet.] At first his name slipped passed my head when I found out about it during clothing design. But then I repeated it to myself mentally, and thought, "Oh my God. You have GOT to be joking." It'd've been nicer if it were just a sick joke.
I asked my friend about it during lunch; she's been close to him since grade school. Way more than me, and she's the neighbor I refered to earlier. She said, "Yeah, he ran away or is missing or something, right?"
"No", I said. "He was discovered hanging from the tree at a park, T'." I couldn't say "He's dead", I just felt like I'd be shooting her if I did. I insinuiated my meaning by looking her dead on. She took her phone to the bathroom and called some people. 15-20 minutes later she came crying, and I held her head and pet her gently, hiding her tear-swollen eyes from people she wanted to avoid. Let her hide from the situation for a moment and grieve without the consistent "Are you ok?!?!?!".
People kept mouthing the question, "What's wrong? Is she ok?" I finally whispered, "A close friend committed suicide". T' said "No, he wouldn't have. He was taking out the trash, still in his pj's at the time. We think someone did it to him." She was upset. I nodded, but I still don't know what to think.
And the truth is? I didn't really care -what- happened. Just that. Well, it happened. [Lynched? Homocide? Suicide? KKK? Someone at school said an overdose on drugs? Please. I know we all have our suspicions, but let's not sollidify them until we get facts. This comment isn't directed, however, towards anyone who's posted.]
As I was walking to work [Kirala sushi, from the Willowsprings apartments; down Iron Pt.], I heard sirens wailing behind me. A firetruck [I think it was that, why don't they make the firetrucks all red anymore?] whizzed by, and I saw some dude ignore the fact that he's supposed to pull over when a firetruck/ambulence/etc passes by. I felt myself get upset and sad all over again.
Anyways, I'm home from work now. And as I type this, I wonder, "Why add 'fuel to the fire'? Why share thoughts that might worry others, or annoy them, or anything else inconvenient?". I haven't thought of an answer other than, "It's my way of trying to respect A'".
He was a great guy. A sweet guy, with a great smile. Smoothest skin ever. And I can't stress his smile. It was full, bright, silly, vibrant, caring, and happy. I log onto myspace to see all the dedications, slideshows, etc for him. Everyone's myspace name has "RIP A'". I got 5 text messages that were chains of "Pass this on in honor of A's memory."
Some of those things were sweet, while some were unnecessary. Some things people posted made the situation sound trivial, and that bothered me.
The message I really want out there is that A' is really missed. To have affected a person as distant as myself. His death got to so many people in so many ways. It's hard to comprehend all the madness and chaos that usurps our concentration when we think about things like death; especially the death of someone we all knew one way or another, someone so close to home. That's what really gets most of us, I think.
It's a crazy thing.
Hopefully, A' will not only be remembered because he was the top story on local news, or the latest thread on a forum, etc. But because he's a good guy. A family member, a friend.
End of the memory. Or something.
[I hope I don't get any negative comments to this. >_>; I noticed some people can be pretty cynical or blunt in this forum sometimes.]
-Phyllis Cho.
#83
EAH
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 12:18 AM
Indeed, this is tragic. My prayers go out to the family and friends of the young boy.
It does seem as if the last 3 months have really hit Folsom hard, what with the family that was murdered, the teacher who was killed in the street racing accident, and now this.
It does seem as if the last 3 months have really hit Folsom hard, what with the family that was murdered, the teacher who was killed in the street racing accident, and now this.
#84
asbestoshills
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 07:09 AM
EAH, Yes, this is a tragedy. Also, I recently found out (I think Sunday's Bee) in the Sacbee, that another CHP had committed suicide in Folsom last month. This information had never been reported in any of our local papers, but the Sacbee had an article on suicide by CHP officers and it mentioned one of the CHP officers was from Folsom. It seems like Folsom tries to hide any negative news about the town so people will think they live in Pleasantville....This town is just like any other.
Americans, don't just come in one color or race.
#85
Mrs.D
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 07:29 AM
AmethystHaze-
Your post is a wonderful tribute to this young man. You did a great job sharing your feelings and shame on anyone that says any different. You seem to be a great friend- supporting and protecting your friend when she needed you. Make sure that you have someone to help you deal with all of this- either your parents, the counselors at school, or another friend.
My heart goes out to all of the kids at FHS and to the families involved.
Your post is a wonderful tribute to this young man. You did a great job sharing your feelings and shame on anyone that says any different. You seem to be a great friend- supporting and protecting your friend when she needed you. Make sure that you have someone to help you deal with all of this- either your parents, the counselors at school, or another friend.
My heart goes out to all of the kids at FHS and to the families involved.
#86
AmethystHaze
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 07:34 AM
QUOTE(Mrs.D @ Mar 14 2007, 07:29 AM) 
AmethystHaze-
Your post is a wonderful tribute to this young man. You did a great job sharing your feelings and shame on anyone that says any different. You seem to be a great friend- supporting and protecting your friend when she needed you. Make sure that you have someone to help you deal with all of this- either your parents, the counselors at school, or another friend.
My heart goes out to all of the kids at FHS and to the families involved.
Your post is a wonderful tribute to this young man. You did a great job sharing your feelings and shame on anyone that says any different. You seem to be a great friend- supporting and protecting your friend when she needed you. Make sure that you have someone to help you deal with all of this- either your parents, the counselors at school, or another friend.
My heart goes out to all of the kids at FHS and to the families involved.
Thank you, Mrs. D. :] It was a bit awkward to post something like that on a public forum, but I'm hoping I did him justice. There's a lot of people today in school who miss him. A lot of people are wearing green, just for him, since it's his favorite color.
#87
idunno
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 08:24 AM
QUOTE(asbestoshills @ Mar 14 2007, 08:09 AM)
EAH, Yes, this is a tragedy. Also, I recently found out (I think Sunday's Bee) in the Sacbee, that another CHP had committed suicide in Folsom last month. This information had never been reported in any of our local papers, but the Sacbee had an article on suicide by CHP officers and it mentioned one of the CHP officers was from Folsom. It seems like Folsom tries to hide any negative news about the town so people will think they live in Pleasantville....This town is just like any other.
asbestoshills-
I think your statement about Folsom trying to hide bad things that happen in the city is way off base. It is policy by the Folsom Police Department that suicides are not made public to protect the family and the deceased. In fact, it is common practice that the news media does not report suicides either. Unless there are other circumstances involved, i.e murder/suicide, the common suicide will not be made public. Let's try to stay away from the conspiracy theory that many of you people thrive on.......you are correct with one statement, Folsom is just like any other city....but much safer
#88
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 08:29 AM
QUOTE(idunno @ Mar 14 2007, 08:24 AM)
asbestoshills-
I think your statement about Folsom trying to hide bad things that happen in the city is way off base. It is policy by the Folsom Police Department that suicides are not made public to protect the family and the deceased. In fact, it is common practice that the news media does not report suicides either. Unless there are other circumstances involved, i.e murder/suicide, the common suicide will not be made public. Let's try to stay away from the conspiracy theory that many of you people thrive on.......you are correct with one statement, Folsom is just like any other city....but much safer
I think your statement about Folsom trying to hide bad things that happen in the city is way off base. It is policy by the Folsom Police Department that suicides are not made public to protect the family and the deceased. In fact, it is common practice that the news media does not report suicides either. Unless there are other circumstances involved, i.e murder/suicide, the common suicide will not be made public. Let's try to stay away from the conspiracy theory that many of you people thrive on.......you are correct with one statement, Folsom is just like any other city....but much safer
I have to agree. Folsom is pretty mellow in comparison. That isn't to say we should disregard some of the accidents and tragedies that have happened, but let's not jump the gun and point fingers at our city for being faulty. Folsom is pretty clean and safe. Bad things happen from time to time though, unfortunantly...
#89
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 09:43 AM
Yeah i knew Andre, he was in my math class all last year. He was a good guy,he will be missed. But i have noticed,ever since the light rail opened,crime has escalated in Folsom,that could have something to do with it. People travel.. It could have also been gang related,not just a hate crime,there are gangs in sacramento and the light rail can bring them. Andre didnt look like he was in a gang or anything,he was a good guy,but you never know these days,gang violence is beginning to increase.
#90
redman
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Posted 14 March 2007 - 09:53 AM
I'm just now catching up with this news and just want to take a moment to post my sincere condolences to the family and friends of this poor kid. This is absolutely horrible news and it is quite scary to have something like this happen so close to home.
I also want to join the voices here pointing out that speculation needs to be controlled as much as possible. While speculation is a natural reaction to this sort of thing, because people are scared and want to know why it happened, speculation can also be very harmful if it goes too far. It's fine to ask questions and discuss our fears and concerns. But none of us, no matter how close we were to the boy, KNOW at this point whether it was suicide or murder, and if it was murder, what the motive was. Some may have strong feelings one way or the other for good reasons, but they simply don't know yet. And, discussing hate crimes at this point in time is irresponsible. From what I can tell, there is nothing pointing in that direction right now. So there's no reason yet to discuss extreme possibilities that, if true, would undermine our feeling of security in our home town in a very big way and would bring even greater anguish to the family and friends of this child.
My post is not meant to flame anyone. It is only intended to encourage keeping the discussion on a productive track. We are all human, and this event brings out fear in all of us.
I also want to join the voices here pointing out that speculation needs to be controlled as much as possible. While speculation is a natural reaction to this sort of thing, because people are scared and want to know why it happened, speculation can also be very harmful if it goes too far. It's fine to ask questions and discuss our fears and concerns. But none of us, no matter how close we were to the boy, KNOW at this point whether it was suicide or murder, and if it was murder, what the motive was. Some may have strong feelings one way or the other for good reasons, but they simply don't know yet. And, discussing hate crimes at this point in time is irresponsible. From what I can tell, there is nothing pointing in that direction right now. So there's no reason yet to discuss extreme possibilities that, if true, would undermine our feeling of security in our home town in a very big way and would bring even greater anguish to the family and friends of this child.
My post is not meant to flame anyone. It is only intended to encourage keeping the discussion on a productive track. We are all human, and this event brings out fear in all of us.
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