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The Way Kids Talk About Race/ethnicity


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#1 bordercolliefan

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Posted 11 June 2014 - 06:21 PM

This isn't meant to incite controversy, but to share information and thoughts on the way kids today talk about race and ethnicity.

I always thought that the more time passed, the more we would move toward a race-blind society. And, thankfully, there is more diversity and more equal opportunity now.

But far from being race blind, my daughters and their friends throw off "race conscious" comments very casually. The other day I said something, and my middle school daughter replied something like, "That's such a white girl thing." Apparently that's quite a common observation to throw around now. Another example: my high school daughter's friends told her she was an "honorary Asian," because she was studious just like them.

It makes me uncomfortable to hear kids dealing so casually in racial/ethnic stereotypes--sometimes embracing stereotypes about their own groups. Thoughts?

#2 WolfMom

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Posted 11 June 2014 - 07:33 PM

If anyone actually reads all of this I will be stunned, impressed and will buy you a bottle of Visine!

 

Part of the thing is that we can try to influence our kids but they spend most of their time in this alternative culture called school. So they have their way of speaking, rituals and belief systems that become more and more alien to us as they grow into the stage where peers become more sought after than family. (They do come back folks. Just let them know that you love them and that you are there for them and when they are out of the school system they will often come back.) Controlling specific language use can be difficult, especially in our region. So far my fourteen year old seems to be pretty chill about it all but we have grown up with many folks of color and walks of life in our "tribe", community is of high importance in our family "culture".

 

When she isn't away on vacation (hurry back home Ash!), my son (age 4) and I spend several hours a week with a good friend and her son (age 2.5). I am Scottish/Paiute and she is African American. We both openly talk about race and differences, we talk about cultural differences while both of our boys torment the dogs and sneak into the mud and track it all over the house.  We talk about serious race issues and we joke around, we have such similar beliefs that we are totally at ease with each other. My son has yet to mention any differences other than he thinks his play buddy gets more attention because he's "still a baby". It's great when we go out shopping and trade off kids (she is younger and better able to run after my little one while her little one likes to hang out in the cart and hug me. The looks we get from people is priceless.

 

My youngest daughter grew up idolizing one of my oldest daughter's friends for her "beautiful brown skin" (the girls was gorgeous) and preferred dark-skinned Barbies. I let her get the Barbie she wanted and never mentioned the differences other than, yes, what lovely skin she has. Funny story . When my father was a hillbilly kid growing up in Apple Hill before it was Apple Hill he grew up with a black family as the closest neighbors. As a child he would stay out in the sun for hours trying to get the same "nice dark tan" his neighbor friend had, what makes this story really funny is my father is a green-eyed, red-headed, freckle-faced Scot. (Yes he has had at least two procedures to remove malignant skin cancer. There is a steep price to pay for trying to keep up with the Joneses.) His neighbor, who was older, thought it was hilarious and encouraged my father (back before we knew what sun exposure could do later on.)

My photo albums from my birthday parties were usually about 60% black friends and 40% white friends. I grew up going to sleep-overs in Oak Park. It was not a big deal. We made jokes back and forth and none of us cared. Race has never been an uncomfortable topic, in fact it is something we talk about as easily as the weather. Parties at our house have a diverse attendance; men, women, young, old, gay, straight and just about every color of the rainbow is represented.

 

So back to the concern, how our kids TALK. Really I think we put too much emphasis on talking a good game and too little emphasis on actual behavior. We are so freaked out about WORDS that we will destroy lives for using the wrong one. Yes, we should be polite and watch how we speak to each other but the amount of secret racism from people who talk perfectly PC to someone's face is what really gets to me. More importantly that what we tell our kids is what they observe from us. They see my husband and I at ease with other races. We watch Jet Li and Jackie Chan, Tyra Banks and adore Bollywood (Ladies, If you have never seen Hrithik Roshan...well...just sayin'). We don't make a big production out of it. Maybe we are just weirder than your average Folsom family???

 

I think part of the problem is extremism on either side of the pendulum swing. Problems arise when we who are so freaked out about being PC that we over-sensitize it. Problems arise when we are so quick to be offended that we create a war when one was not needed. Problems arise when we are so fearful of talking about it that we don't talk about it. The more my friend Ash and I talk about race differences, the more comfortable we became with each other. She complains to me about her hair and I complain to her about my farmer's tan.

 

So maybe instead of worrying about their conversations we can directly engage these conversations, don't have them back off of it, make them delve deeper. Turn something possibly stressful into something joyfully exploratory.  If they make an Asian comment, take them to the Annual Japanese Food & Cultural Bazaar at the Buddhist Temple in Sacramento (Usually the second weekend of August, AH-MAZING drumming!) If they make an African American comment take them to something like the Annual Sweet Potato Festival (usually in the spring) put on by the Sacramento Valley Section of the National Council of Negro Women. Skip a soccer match, a wine tasting or a yoga class and try something that will take you deeper into the conversation rather than try to censor it. Make it a deeper, richer opportunity for the kids and the grown-ups to step outside of their comfort zone until it actually makes you comfortable. (Funny how that works.) Counter-act some of the negative culture of school by exploring some other cultures together.

 

After all, nothing brings family together like all of you looking like dorks learning how to do "The Wobble" together. ;)


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#3 WolfMom

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Posted 11 June 2014 - 07:41 PM

I also meant to say, this is not necessarily a chance for you to teach your child something but more of an opportunity to learn something along-side your child. Let them see your own sense of wonder, let them see you learn and admit to not knowing something and watch the walls come down.


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#4 nomad

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Posted 11 June 2014 - 07:47 PM

This isn't meant to incite controversy, but to share information and thoughts on the way kids today talk about race and ethnicity.

I always thought that the more time passed, the more we would move toward a race-blind society. And, thankfully, there is more diversity and more equal opportunity now.

But far from being race blind, my daughters and their friends throw off "race conscious" comments very casually. The other day I said something, and my middle school daughter replied something like, "That's such a white girl thing." Apparently that's quite a common observation to throw around now. Another example: my high school daughter's friends told her she was an "honorary Asian," because she was studious just like them.

It makes me uncomfortable to hear kids dealing so casually in racial/ethnic stereotypes--sometimes embracing stereotypes about their own groups. Thoughts?

 

Wow, where to start. Do you really think that just as time passes the world will become more "race blind?" That's quite a Utopian dream but you're welcomed to that.

 

People are so over sensitive it's a joke. Liberals are so afraid to even mention anything "race" related because they fear they will offend somebody. Gimme a break. Ever heard of an Asian "F" in school? Look that one up. And yes, Asians talk and joke about it all the time. "White girl thing?" that's uncomfortable? You say you've been all over the world but you act very unworldly.

 

And I find it funny when people are afraid to say or struggle to describe a black person. "Oh you mean the black guy?" "Yes, him." Done. Not..."um, the African American guy..." who most likely has no ties to Africa at all unless of course he's Nigerian which is easily identified by his name if you have any experience.

 

And talk about racially divisive, how about Mr. Obama? He picks and chooses things to comment on that are very focused, like "If I had a son, he'd be just like Treyvon..." but yet he ignores the dozens of blacks that are killed on the streets of his "hometown" of Chicago every weekend. 

 

Yeah, take a look at where these stereo types come from, it's pretty easy to see.



#5 bordercolliefan

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Posted 11 June 2014 - 09:31 PM

I think one concern I have is that this contributes to the balkanization of our society. Now, there aren't just human problems; there are "white girl problems." Good students aren't just good students; they can be honorary members of the "Asian club."

Is it a good thing for us to think of ourselves as divided into all these little groups, instead of just as all unique members of one club called humanity?

#6 WolfMom

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Posted 12 June 2014 - 05:52 AM

That is one of the wonderful and problematic things of the human brain. One of our basic, automatic mental functions is to categorize. It helps us to limit the overwhelm of information our brain receives. We begin to categorize and filter out that which is not a threat (or something we immediately want/need to deal with). If our brains had to process every single piece of information we receive we would be paralyzed. And so we categorize to make things simpler so we may function (we do this both consciously and subconsciously). We learn that people who wear nicely ironed polos and slacks tend not to mug people and so we categorize them in to the "safe to ignore, perhaps good business contact" territory. We see someone in a spike collar that smells and is twitching and our brain categorizes them into the "possibly dangerous, watch out of the corner of your eye" is it right or wrong? It is just what our brain does, it is, by nature, a profiler and it is a survival instinct.

Perhaps we let that be okay? We allow our brain to do it's work, with the understanding that it can be wrong (sometimes the mass murderer *is* the guy in the nice polo). Sometimes we may even act or speak on it, be gentle with yourself and others about it. Recognize that this is a natural response. We have been taught that discrimination is a bad word, actually before the modern era the definition of that word was more along the lines of "recognition and understanding of the difference between one thing and another". That is a good thing, a skill. It is using that knowledge to be harmful or hateful to another person that is the problem.

 

I guess maybe the idea is to try to retrain ourselves to worry less about popular buzzwords and cultural specific taboo and worry more about the general practice of speaking, acting out with and treating people with love. Recognize our natural caution and fear of the different as a teacher and survival instinct but do not allow it to overcome our conscious decision to treat others well.


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#7 Steve Heard

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Posted 12 June 2014 - 10:28 AM

This isn't meant to incite controversy, but to share information and thoughts on the way kids today talk about race and ethnicity.

I always thought that the more time passed, the more we would move toward a race-blind society. And, thankfully, there is more diversity and more equal opportunity now.

 

I'm always up for a discussion of race. It's a favorite topic of mine.

 

Race-blindness and equal opportunity are not the same thing.

 

I don't want or expect a race-blind society.  It is great that we can recognize, respect and celebrate our differences. The problems arise when we treat people differently, giving less respect and opportunity to them because they are different. 

 

Every now and then, and it happened two days ago, some well-meaning white person will say 'I don't think of you as black'. 

 

Well, thank you, I think, but please do think of me as black, but I'm also part white, I'm male, middle aged, a jazz fan, volunteer, father, husband, Realtor, joker  and so many other things. My ethnicity is only a part of who I am.

 

I do not give less respect or opportunity to anyone because of their race.

 

 

 

Wow, where to start. Do you really think that just as time passes the world will become more "race blind?" That's quite a Utopian dream but you're welcomed to that.

 

People are so over sensitive it's a joke. Liberals are so afraid to even mention anything "race" related because they fear they will offend somebody. Gimme a break. Ever heard of an Asian "F" in school? Look that one up. And yes, Asians talk and joke about it all the time. "White girl thing?" that's uncomfortable? You say you've been all over the world but you act very unworldly.

 

And I find it funny when people are afraid to say or struggle to describe a black person. "Oh you mean the black guy?" "Yes, him." Done. Not..."um, the African American guy..." who most likely has no ties to Africa at all unless of course he's Nigerian which is easily identified by his name if you have any experience.

 

And talk about racially divisive, how about Mr. Obama? He picks and chooses things to comment on that are very focused, like "If I had a son, he'd be just like Treyvon..." but yet he ignores the dozens of blacks that are killed on the streets of his "hometown" of Chicago every weekend. 

 

Yeah, take a look at where these stereo types come from, it's pretty easy to see.

 

The danger in your argument, blaming it on Liberals is that racism is based on ignorance, not on political ideology. You also open yourself, and this conversation, up to the possibility of a battle of blame. 

 

I won't make a list of conservatives who have belonged to and supported racist organizations such as the KKK and Sons of the Confederacy, or have defended and supported racist, segregationist policies, but it's easy to do.

 

The funny thing is, that when it's convenient, some conservatives say that liberals are too sensitive and that we can't mention race, then when it's convenient, will say that it's the liberals who are always mentioning race. 

 

As I said, I'm always up for a discussion on race, and I'm socially liberal.

 

As for the President, I didn't feel his comments about Trayvon were divisive, and most people that I've talked about the issue with, both black and white, understood his message. Throughout our history, blacks were beaten, framed, lynched and otherwise mistreated and their plight ignored by our leaders. Crimes against blacks were often ignored or unsolved.

 

For decades, presidents (7 of them) petitioned Congress for a Federal law making lynching a felony. Over 200 bills were written and killed. 

 

Black Americans saw their homes and businesses destroyed when they were perceived to be gaining to much economic power, and with no repercussions.

 

Many people believed that Trayvon Martin would be demonized and that his killer would go free.

 

So, when asked about his opinion of the Trayvon Martin case, President Obama said, among other things, 'I have to be careful about my statements to make sure I'm not impairing any investigation going on right now. Obviously, this is a tragedy. I can only imagine what these parents are going through. And when I think about this boy, I think about my own kids. I think every parent in America should be able to understand why it is absolutely imperative that we investigate every aspect of this and that everybody pulls together, federal state and local, to figure out exactly how this tragedy happened.

 

My main message is to the parents of Trayvon Martin: If I had a son, he'd look like Trayvon. I think they are right to expect that all of us as Americans are going to take this with the seriousness it deserves, and we're going to get to the bottom of what happened."

 

I think black felt a collective sigh of relief and that finally, the death of a black kid was not going to be swept under the rug. We had assurance from the President himself.

 

While many people embraced that sentiment and were grateful for the President's assurances, many others said, 'How divisive!' and 'He's race-baiting!'

 

I saw nothing of the sort.

 

He later said "The African-American community is also knowledgeable that there is a history of racial disparities in the application of our criminal laws, everything from the death penalty to enforcement of our drug laws, and that ends up having an impact in terms of how people interpret the case."

 

He was speaking the truth, not dividing the country.

 

Back to Wolfmom's original angle on this, our kids first get their opinions about race right at home, but they are shaped by their peers and as they grow older, their experiences.

 

I've often mentioned the fact that when the terrorist attacks of 9/11 happened, there was a little boy from Afghanistan in my daughter's 3rd grade class. Shortly thereafter, he became a pariah, being ostracized, bullied, called 'terrorist' and 'muslim' by the other kids. Where did they get those terms and attitudes from? They were 8 years old!

 

My other daughter went to elementary school with the son of Officer Petri Byrd, the bailiff on Judge Judy.  I'll call him 'D'. He was a sweet kid. 

 

When they were in kindergarten she came home one day and told me, 'Today, I was playing with Nadia, and I said, 'let's play with D', and she said, 'No, my dad said not to play with the black kids.'

 

Now, with me being mixed race and my wife being of Italian and Mexican heritage, my daughter doesn't always 'look black'. I asked her, 'What did you do?' 

 

She replied, 'I didn't tell her I was black, or she wouldn't play with me either.'  That broke my heart.

 

A short time l was driving my daughter home from school, when a tiny little girl on a bicycle, without even looking, crossed rode across my path, and I had to slam on my brakes to avoid hitting her. My daughter said, 'Hey, there's Nadia!'

 

I thought, 'This kid's father let's his 5 year old ride a bike on her own to and from school, exposing her to the dangers of traffic and criminals, but that's okay, as long as she doesn't play with black kids.'

 

Racism comes in all colors. Nadia was from the middle-east.

 

A long-time friend of my brother-in-law, who is Hispanic, had 3 sons. She was a single mom, struggling to get by.

 

She told my sister that when her oldest told her he wanted to join the army, she said, 'Don't be joining the army to fight for the white man!'

 

That boy, and another of her sons, were later killed in separate gang-related shootings. I think they'd have been safer in the army. 

 

I've heard and seen it all...I think. 

 

I once asked my oldest how often she heard the 'n-word' at school here in Folsom. She said, 'about every day'.

 

It's gotten to the point, thanks in large part to hip-hop music, that it is just another word in the lexicon. 

 

My neighbor monitors his teen-aged,  blonde-haired, blue-eyed son's text messages. He said that him and his friends, all white, frequently text 'what's up, my nigga?' 

 

I have a long-time friend from the Phillipines. He's got 5 young adult kids, and there's almost always a party at his house. I am no longer shocked by them calling each other nigga.

 

Terms like 'white-girl thing', and 'honorary Asian' seem tame in comparison, and I'm not sure that I should be worried about any of it.


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#8 supermom

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Posted 12 June 2014 - 08:12 PM

This isn't meant to incite controversy, but to share information and thoughts on the way kids today talk about race and ethnicity.

I always thought that the more time passed, the more we would move toward a race-blind society. And, thankfully, there is more diversity and more equal opportunity now.

But far from being race blind, my daughters and their friends throw off "race conscious" comments very casually. The other day I said something, and my middle school daughter replied something like, "That's such a white girl thing." Apparently that's quite a common observation to throw around now. Another example: my high school daughter's friends told her she was an "honorary Asian," because she was studious just like them.

It makes me uncomfortable to hear kids dealing so casually in racial/ethnic stereotypes--sometimes embracing stereotypes about their own groups. Thoughts?

My kids and their friends do not talk like that. Actually my oldest threatened to slap someone backwards through the evolutionary process if she heard them talk like that, once. I was quite proud. Many of the kids at different age levels are experimenting on what is acceptable around teachers , their peers and parents, and yes, their peers parents. A quick comment about believing in color blindness to allow all people to be reminded that equality is first and foremost a thought process- usually is enough for middle school-ers and HS. The younger ones are the one's who will challenge it and ask questions. Which is a great conversation to have in the car.



#9 TruthSeeker

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Posted 13 June 2014 - 12:50 PM

 

The danger in your argument, blaming it on Liberals is that racism is based on ignorance, not on political ideology. You also open yourself, and this conversation, up to the possibility of a battle of blame. 

 

I won't make a list of conservatives who have belonged to and supported racist organizations such as the KKK and Sons of the Confederacy, or have defended and supported racist, segregationist policies, but it's easy to do.

 

 

Wait a minute, hold the phone, history shows it was indeed the democrats (liberals) who were pro slavery and fought against abolishing slavery and were racists who supported segregationist policies to keep slavery alive and well - slavery was a big business for them.  The republicansn(conservatives) were the ones who fought to abolish slavery under Republican President Abraham Lincoln - and that's how the civil war started.

 

The KKK was started by six veterans of the Confederate Army that were fighting to keep slavery intact (for the democratic party).

I did some research and could not find any information that supports your statement that conservatives supported the KKK and Sons of Confederacy.


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#10 Steve Heard

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Posted 14 June 2014 - 10:07 AM

 

Wait a minute, hold the phone, history shows it was indeed the democrats (liberals) who were pro slavery and fought against abolishing slavery and were racists who supported segregationist policies to keep slavery alive and well - slavery was a big business for them.  The republicansn(conservatives) were the ones who fought to abolish slavery under Republican President Abraham Lincoln - and that's how the civil war started.

 

The KKK was started by six veterans of the Confederate Army that were fighting to keep slavery intact (for the democratic party).

I did some research and could not find any information that supports your statement that conservatives supported the KKK and Sons of Confederacy.

 

That is absolutely correct. It is also correct that some of the most powerful segregationists left the Democratic party as the Civil Rights movement picked up momentum, some as Dixiecrats, some as Republicans, and as American Independents. There were others, however, who remained with the party and enjoyed long careers in politics. 

 

As for supporting the KKK and segregation, here are a few names you might know: Strom Thurmond, Jesse Helms, Trent Lott, David Duke. 

 

Don't forget my earlier statement that racism is based on ignorance, not political party.


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#11 Homer

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Posted 16 June 2014 - 11:30 AM

 

That is absolutely correct. It is also correct that some of the most powerful segregationists left the Democratic party as the Civil Rights movement picked up momentum, some as Dixiecrats, some as Republicans, and as American Independents. There were others, however, who remained with the party and enjoyed long careers in politics. 

 

As for supporting the KKK and segregation, here are a few names you might know: Strom Thurmond, Jesse Helms, Trent Lott, David Duke. 

 

Don't forget my earlier statement that racism is based on ignorance, not political party.

 

 

I agree that racism is based on ignorance and if you look around enough you can find examples of it across the political spectrum, However in my opinion it's currently Democrats/Liberals that are invested in identity politics, As an example look at how viciously any Black, Hispanic,Female or gay public figure that speaks out with an independent thought is attacked in the media. Since the post civil rights era when ever a Republican says or does something dumb they usually lose the support of the party, When Trent Lott made that dumb speech praising Strom Thurmond on his 100th birthday he was forced to resign, When David Duke won the Republican primary the party denounced him and endorsed the Democrat running against him, Yet on a regular basis former KKK member Sen. Robert Byrd can drop N-bombs in interviews on national tv at will and it's ok for Obama to hang out with Al Sharpton and attend Rev. Wrights church,Do you really believe that G.W. Bush would get a pass if he hung out with Tom Metzger and attended a Christian Identity church for 20 years ?  



#12 Steve Heard

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Posted 16 June 2014 - 12:31 PM

 

 

I agree that racism is based on ignorance and if you look around enough you can find examples of it across the political spectrum, However in my opinion it's currently Democrats/Liberals that are invested in identity politics, As an example look at how viciously any Black, Hispanic,Female or gay public figure that speaks out with an independent thought is attacked in the media. Since the post civil rights era when ever a Republican says or does something dumb they usually lose the support of the party, When Trent Lott made that dumb speech praising Strom Thurmond on his 100th birthday he was forced to resign, When David Duke won the Republican primary the party denounced him and endorsed the Democrat running against him, Yet on a regular basis former KKK member Sen. Robert Byrd can drop N-bombs in interviews on national tv at will and it's ok for Obama to hang out with Al Sharpton and attend Rev. Wrights church,Do you really believe that G.W. Bush would get a pass if he hung out with Tom Metzger and attended a Christian Identity church for 20 years ?  

 

Let's not get into the 'more racist than thou' argument.

 

If you only look at it Liberal/Democrat sins, that's all you'll find. There are countless, and I mean countless, examples of conservatives doing some pretty hateful things. We'll get nowhere by tossing them back and forth. 

 

You can't seriously equate Tom Metzger with Rev. Wright or Al Sharpton.

 

Metzger was founder and leader of a violent organization founded on principles of segregation and white supremacy, and who called the killing of blacks 'civic duty'. 

 

Wright and Sharpton are blowhard church and civil rights leaders. Sharpton has proved himself to be a fool many times.

 

And while I don't condone some of the things he's said and done, he's been given great power by the press, who just love to put a microphone and a camera in front of him every chance they get, and has become a force to be reckoned with. He's never been elected as spokesman for black America, and I don't know many people who think of him as anything but a blowhard idiot.

 

Again, it's not going to do us any good to list racists, crap-disturbers and dolts who have met with, prayed with or played golf with our political leaders.

 

It would be far more productive to each do our part to change attitudes than to cast blame.


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#13 Homer

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Posted 16 June 2014 - 03:18 PM

 

Let's not get into the 'more racist than thou' argument.

 

If you only look at it Liberal/Democrat sins, that's all you'll find. There are countless, and I mean countless, examples of conservatives doing some pretty hateful things. We'll get nowhere by tossing them back and forth. 

 

You can't seriously equate Tom Metzger with Rev. Wright or Al Sharpton.

 

Metzger was founder and leader of a violent organization founded on principles of segregation and white supremacy, and who called the killing of blacks 'civic duty'. 

 

Wright and Sharpton are blowhard church and civil rights leaders. Sharpton has proved himself to be a fool many times.

 

And while I don't condone some of the things he's said and done, he's been given great power by the press, who just love to put a microphone and a camera in front of him every chance they get, and has become a force to be reckoned with. He's never been elected as spokesman for black America, and I don't know many people who think of him as anything but a blowhard idiot.

 

Again, it's not going to do us any good to list racists, crap-disturbers and dolts who have met with, prayed with or played golf with our political leaders.

 

It would be far more productive to each do our part to change attitudes than to cast blame.

 

 

"You can't seriously equate Tom Metzger with Rev. Wright or Al Sharpton."

 

I'll give it a try, I think i can bring it full circle. Metzger and Sharpton are both responsible for instigating racial violence that led to deaths of other people. Al Sharpton has attended and spoken at rally's of The New Black Panther Party and promoted them on his radio show. Tom Metzger is an ally of the New Black Panther Party and has been an invited guest speaker at their conventions, The N.B.P.P. and Metzger have an alliance like the KKK and Marcus Garvey did in the past. 

 

Tom Metzger is a pariah that would taint anyone that associated with him as it should be. However Sharpton who has a similar background and associations gets a pass and a TV show.   



#14 Steve Heard

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Posted 16 June 2014 - 03:58 PM

 

 

"You can't seriously equate Tom Metzger with Rev. Wright or Al Sharpton."

 

I'll give it a try, I think i can bring it full circle. Metzger and Sharpton are both responsible for instigating racial violence that led to deaths of other people. Al Sharpton has attended and spoken at rally's of The New Black Panther Party and promoted them on his radio show. Tom Metzger is an ally of the New Black Panther Party and has been an invited guest speaker at their conventions, The N.B.P.P. and Metzger have an alliance like the KKK and Marcus Garvey did in the past. 

 

Tom Metzger is a pariah that would taint anyone that associated with him as it should be. However Sharpton who has a similar background and associations gets a pass and a TV show.   

 

Good and fair comparison.

 

Sharpton doesn't deserve a platform and has a show on MSNBC, which he should not, and is a frequent guest on FOX, too, which only gives him more opportunity to look like an idiot.


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#15 supermom

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Posted 16 June 2014 - 07:44 PM

Is it bad, that some of the names you are throwing around- I don't know who they are? <flinching and ducking in case you guys throw something>

I have to be honest, whenever I see certain names come up- I just gloss over the article or stop reading.  Is it bad that I am that disenfranchised with certain political movers&shakers? Heck, I just think that there is a medium ground that most people can generally meet at, and have a meal, watch their kids play, get services like tire changes or church- without so much animosity. If somewhere in there, my definition of color blind means that since my kids aren't cops thy don't need to label people that finitely; and can get away with describing someone by their clothing or or accessories- then that is the general way people ought to behave in public. Practicing that many times in public isn't easy unless it happens at home, too. So, generally, thats how we do it when talking about someone on tv, too. Am I a reverse racist or whatever for wanting my kids to understand that there are less boxes and more free room to excel in this world when you try to be more inclusive? Sure, i think so. Is a reverse racist a bad person? I don't think so. My idea of reverse racism is one who counters the ideals of prejudice by refusing to use the same methods to identify oneself or others. Reverse racism is about acknowledging that all people are essentially the same. We all wear jeans. We all wear shoes. We all have hair (unless you're Steve). Lol. {luv ya Steve!}So, my idea of a racial blindness is a bit different than Steve's. 

I'm not disregarding someone's race by descriptions of clothing. What I am doing is treating them all as inclusive to a common basic thread. Literally. A thread.. 

So, when is it ok to bring up someone's race? I leave these rules flexible but offer this advice- when someone is openly celebrating their culture, acknowledge it. Offer a nice word/platitude (yes i say platitude because sometimes the only thing that comes to mind is "wow, you look nice" especially if you don't know the name of the clothing they are wearing). Some people at work wear specific clothing on certain days of the year. That is a good way to get to know some of the backgrounds and attitudes/leaning/ beliefs of your coworkers. 

When they aren't wearing those cultural pieces of attire- I am assuming they wish to be treated and assimilated as a member of the office. Professional attire. That means we are all pros and know it. 

Anyway, youths all have their moments when they are testing the boundaries, learning what is socially acceptable, learning if they consider themselves a member of that social group or a group that is outside the socially normal/permissive or intolerant. Some choose to be radicals and some choose not to. Others just seems to Be radical without any internal influence. 

Anyway, thats just to clarify what I meant by color blind. 






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