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Antics In The Library


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#16 4thgenFolsomite

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 07:52 PM

conversation with crazy can be challenging. if you do, be ready to disengage the best you can.
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#17 OceanGirl

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Posted 29 August 2012 - 11:04 PM

Interesting- we go to the library quite a bit too- but have never seen these folks. My first thought- had I been in your shoes would have been- Am I on one of those candid camera shows that sets you up secretly?!! Second thought when reading about this- I hope they are not trying to steal things from people. Finally, if there is some sort of undiagnosed or diagnosed mental issue there- I feel sorry for the couple and hope they can get some help if needed.
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#18 4thgenFolsomite

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 08:04 AM

sometimes people don't need help as much as they need understanding.
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#19 Rich_T

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 10:53 AM

I'll have to admit, that's an entertaining story. But yes, it must have been creepy for you. Either that older lady is mentally "off", or she gets her jollies by pretending to be crazy, to see how people react. Either way, I'd report the disturbance to library staff, and have them deal with her.

I also have to confess, I couldn't help but laugh when I read your little Dickensian (because not necessary to the plot) detail: "I pull out my laptop and start reading an article on racism in police procedures...."

#20 4thgenFolsomite

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:07 AM

I'm trying to figure out what offense this poor batty woman has committed. Space issues? Seems like her biggest offense is asking to sit next to someone when there are other seats available. I doubt library staff can do anything and she's a regular, so they are likely already aware of her. I say live and let live and maybe we can give people who are less fortunate a little break for being eccentric.
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#21 supermom

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:16 AM

I also have to confess, I couldn't help but laugh when I read your little Dickensian (because not necessary to the plot) detail: "I pull out my laptop and start reading an article on racism in police procedures...."


Well, I was trying to study different angles on it for a paper I had to write.

#22 Rich_T

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:16 AM

I'm trying to figure out what offense this poor batty woman has committed. Space issues? Seems like her biggest offense is asking to sit next to someone when there are other seats available. I doubt library staff can do anything and she's a regular, so they are likely already aware of her. I say live and let live and maybe we can give people who are less fortunate a little break for being eccentric.


It becomes a hostile (or crazy) act if she keeps seeking out Supermom and freaking her out. I bet you wouldn't let me off the hook so easily if I did the same. You don't go around moving other people's backpacks, etc, unless there is something wrong with you.

#23 ducky

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:18 AM

I'm trying to figure out what offense this poor batty woman has committed. Space issues? Seems like her biggest offense is asking to sit next to someone when there are other seats available. I doubt library staff can do anything and she's a regular, so they are likely already aware of her. I say live and let live and maybe we can give people who are less fortunate a little break for being eccentric.


I agree there is no harm in her choosing to sit next to someone when other seats are available. The part where it gets eccentric is when she then asks the person she's sitting next to to move so her husband can sit down when she could have chosen another place that would have accommodated both of them.

Also, moving someone else's things really isn't okay either. I wouldn't have made a big deal and probably would have just moved the first time. If it happened repeatedly, I would probably in my nicest voice say, "I'm sorry, but I'm kind of settled in here. There's some comfy seats over there where both of you can sit." If she huffs away, she huffs away.

#24 4thgenFolsomite

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:18 AM

It becomes a hostile (or crazy) act if she keeps seeking out Supermom and freaking her out. I bet you wouldn't let me off the hook so easily if I did the same. You don't go around moving other people's backpacks, etc, unless there is something wrong with you.


that's true. then it rises to the point of being obnoxious. clearly there is something wrong with her, but that's not an offense. Supermom seems less freaked out than forgiving and worried about the husband's feelings though. She doesn't seem afraid to go back to the library.
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#25 supermom

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:31 AM

No. I'm not afraid to go back to the library. And to be fair to RichT, if it had been a man acting that way--my response more than likely would have been much different. Only because my previous experiences with assertive/aggressive men tells me that their 0 to 60 travel mode from verbal aggressive to physical aggressive is usually much faster than a woman's.

And yes, I think she does seek me out. I'm not sure that I am the reason, perhaps it is something else like my hair color or my features. I get the distinct feeling that when the woman is talking directly to me- even when being very assertive-- that she is really talking to someone else and I am incidental to the situation.

So on that note, I think that my previous experience working with mentally ill people really failed me. I think that I was in a "safe zone" and very much focused on "me" and my work ( I get extremely focused when studying for a paper) -- The thing is that I feel guilty, because I think that I accepted this ladie's behavior as odd not once but on three different occasions. And my previous experiences with mentally ill people has directly given me the tools to understand how to converse and diffuse situations like this in a respectful and human manner. So, I do feel bad. I think I failed this woman, and her husband. And it makes me think that it is very possible the reason she sought me out, is because I may well have that 'approachable' demeanor.

But, I just wasn't expecting this to happen in that environment, and when I was clearly focused on something outside of work or volunteer types of things...

The more I think about this, the worse I feel about the way I did handle it

#26 4thgenFolsomite

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 11:36 AM

I bet you will see them again. not to worry.
Knowing the past helps deciphering the future.

#27 Rich_T

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Posted 30 August 2012 - 12:53 PM

The more I think about this, the worse I feel about the way I did handle it


Don't beat yourself up about it. And you probably WILL see her again, so maybe this will all get figured out.

#28 menicksmom

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Posted 31 August 2012 - 11:02 AM

Sounds like a woman I have encountered there. I sometimes hang out there for an hour while my son is at baseball practice. I was there reading, when she came up to my table and sat right next to me. I looked around at all the empty seats and wondered why she chose next to me. Her husband did not sit down, but there was room. He just stood there. She never spoke to me, but I felt uncomfortable and left. I have since seen her again, but avoided her. I have noticed her also going to the garbage cans at the park, retrieving recyclabes. She has short, gray hair, more straighter than curly.

Recyclables? Could this have anything to do with the older pickup I often see if the parking lot FULL of recyclables? I thought maybe someone was living in the truck, but upon revisiting the photograph I took (Yes, I thought my husband wouldn't believe me!), it is full of newspapers and clean plastic containers.




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